Should dh and I have the pin code to each other's phone?

[bluebellll]

I don't have a reason to believe my husband would do anything untrustworthy but for some reason it's bugging me that I don't know the pin on his phone. I wouldn't mind if he had mine. I would like to hear your opinions?

Thanks

[SandyY2K]

I like my privacy... so I wouldn't want this is my marriage. Luckily we feel the same.

If people want to cheat... they would hopefully be smart enough to get a second phone or have other ways not to get caught... so knowing passwords means nothing to me.

I've known seasoned cheaters who leave their phones lying around...but they will and truly cover their tracks.

In this day and age... people who get caught with phones are really careless and complacent.

Trust is key.

[sunflowersandtulips50]

I know my DH but he doesnt know mine. He has no reason to use my phone and the only reason I know his is because he has been ill and wanted me to check his emails and messages.

[category12]

If you don't trust him, then maybe it's time to reconsider the relationship?

Leave your phone behind sometime and ask if you can borrow his to Google something, while he's driving, for example. If he refuses or acts weird about it, that's more information.

[Topseyt]

We don't know each other's pins, although I have a fair idea what DH's would be.

I want my privacy and he wants his. I don't think it odd at all.

[NinkiNonkiNikau]

I know DH’s and he knows mine. I never check his phone or he mine but neither of us stresses if we need to use the other persons phone, so...

[birdy124]

Hmm i didn't have his pin and found he was talking to other women on WhatsApp (randomly saw it pop up in the screen) then got his pin and 6 month slater found he cheated on me with all communication going via LinkedIn. If there's a will there's a way

[Dontletitbeyou]

I’m all for sharing , but draw the line at this . It feels controlling to ask someone to give you their pin code for access to their phone .
Everyone needs a bit of privacy , I agree it’s disconcerting that most affairs are caught by partners finding messages etc on the others phone , but ....
you either trust your you don’t .
As you are already a little curious , if you had his pin code , what would be the chances at some point you would have a browse through it ?

[Strangeday21]

We have the same pin - I’ve never ‘looked’ at his phone - unless he’s with me & asked me to check something and vice versa. I’ve never thought about him/me knowing is a trust issue - I’ve never felt a need to sneakily look at his phone - I would never read his messages/emails.

[BadTattoosAndSmellLikeBooze]

I know my partners pin on his phone. He probably doesn’t remember mine. 🙄 We also open each other’s post and emails.

I wouldn’t trust your husband in your situation OP. It do think it sounds suspicious.

[Cincoperros]

We have eachothers. Just practical for driving or a quick google/message to a mutal contact. Also when one of the dogs are doing something adorable but fleeting it might be the others phone closer haha. Actually we have eachothers card pin numbers too and passwords to email accounts and stuff in an encripted doc that we can both see.
My amazon acount is MINE though hahaha

[fallfallfall]

we have each other's and neither of us care.

[Sakurami]

It does sound weird that when you had his code he was really protective of his phone and now he isn't. That to me sounds like he has something to hide!

I used to never have a pin on my phone and left my facebook and emails open on the PC. I left my phone lying around because i didn't have anything to hide (and also because he had trust issues, it was proving to him that I wasn't up to anything). He had his phone and laptop password protected though and that bugged me. In my previous relationships we didn't lock our phones and laptops but didn't snoop. So a bit like not locking your personal belongings at home. They can if they want go through your stuff because you don't lock it away but you don't.

[whiteroseredrose]

DH and I know each other's codes and use the same system for passwords. The DC (20 and 17) know them too - both of us used to have a tendency to forget them - though I don't know theirs.

We obviously don't do 'privacy' as much as some families!

You said your DH now has face recognition but has his pin actually changed?

If his phone is lying around I'd use it to eg check the weather or something and try his old pin. If it didn't work I'd just ask him for the new one. I'd be suspicious if he refused to tell me as I can't think of any reason why he would.

[OooErrThor]

We all know each other's in our house, me, DH and teenagers. Although DH can never remember mine or youngest DC.

No privacy, it's an open house here - we just always ask first.

[RandomTree]

DH knows mine. I don't know his current one, I'm sure he'd tell me if I asked but I've never needed or wanted it.

[CeeceeBloomingdale]

We don't know each others passcodes. its not a secret, it's just there's no need to as we trust each other. if he asked I'd tell him it and vice versa. Similarly he wouldnt check my handbag or diary (literally just a date book with school events and boring things like hair appointments in) without seeking permission as we respect each others privacy.

[rwalker]

No rude and invasive we are all entitled to privacy . Would see it as abusive and controlling if other half wanted my own/password

Theres only 1 reason u need pin/password and thats to snoop if you feel the need to do that call it a day now.

[joystir59]

We had (past tense as DW died recently) each other's pin codes, and used each others phones to Google stuff, take photos, but never to check up on each other because we trusted each other

[Wallywobbles]

We do. And thumb prints. Actually we share a password app so I have access to pretty much everything and visa versa. Never met anyone I trust as much.

[AuntieStella]

We shared, just for convenience.

It didn't even occur to me that there would be anything on there he wouid not want me to see. Not that I go looking.

Password protection is to keep miscreants out. I'm not a miscreant (from his pov- you lot can make your own minds up)

[sammylady37]

Woe betide the man who thinks he should have access to my phone. I would never be happy with someone having the pin for it. It’s not that I need anything to be kept secret, but I do value my privacy and that of those who message/email me. Also I would not tolerate someone who didn’t trust me. If they trot out the “trust issues from the past” line they’ll be told to go work on them pretty sharpish and not to make me pay for someone else’s actions

[Cheeseycheeseycheesecheese]

Dh and I have each others, usually because we grab the nearest phone when we want to check something/call someone.

I don't think there's a reason to have it, but equally there's no reason not to have it. Its just different people have different bounderies.

[purplemunkey]

We haven’t purposefully ‘shared’ with each other but anytime either of us has needed to use each other’s phone we just say the PIN number. DH has a good memory so probably remembers mine, I’d have to be reminded.

Putting a PIN on you phone is a basic security measure but it’s no massive secret from each other. Having said that - I do think I’d find it a bit odd if DH suddenly said one day ‘I think I should have your phone PIN’ for no particular reason. I’d think he planned on checking up on me - I’ve nothing to hide it I don’t think I’d like him riffling through my bag just cos he felt like it either. It’s my stuff!

[Notjustabrunette]

We know each other’s in our house, we sometimes need to use each other’s phones.

[PercyKirke]

DW and I know PINs and passwords to all our devices. Why wouldn't we?