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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Parter having late 20's crisis....help!!!

2 replies

pygmyangel · 04/10/2007 14:42

I need to get this off my chest, even just writing it down may help but some advice on how to handle it would be appreciated. My DP is going through some sort of not quite 30 crisis. Last night on the way to pick up our DS from his grandmas, DP started saying how sick he was of going from crap job to crap job and never getting anywhere and was thinking about joining the navy. I of course expressed how unhappy I would be about this as I would not want to be left alone for months on end with 2 DC's (we have DS who's 5 and LO due in 3 weeks). His Dad and best friend are both in the merchant navy and both sometimes spend 4 months at a time away at sea. He's 28, has a degree and was thinking about training as a teacher.
Nothing more was said until later on after tea when it was obvious something was wrong and DP went and just sat on the couch hugging a cusion. I tried to ask what was wrong and was told to leave him alone. He didn't say a word all night then got up to go to work this morning in silence. He normally phones me every lunch time and today he didn't. I phoned him and when asked why he hadn't phoned ne said he couldn't be bothered to speak to me. When I asked what was wrong he, in true male fasion said 'nothing' then put the phone down.
He's had his tantrums before but nothing like this, what do I do. Do I ignore hime and hope he sorts himself out. I think trying to talk to him may be a waste of time as he doesn't normally like to talk about his problems. I'm 37 wks pregnant so obviously not in a stable frame of mind and i've been in tears most of today.

OP posts:
CountessDracula · 04/10/2007 14:45

Weeellllll I would say he is having an about to be 30 AND have a third baby crisis

Decade birthdays do cause ructions in your head IME

Does he have a crap job or is that his perception? He may be feeling trapped by that if so, or trapped by the thought that with three children he is effectively trapped as he can't afford to start again doing something different.

Just a thought

CountessDracula · 04/10/2007 14:46

what i mean re decade birthdays is they cause you to reflect on where you were 10 years ago and where you thought you would be in 10 years. IF the two don't match or exceed expectation it can cause a crisis

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