Very longtime poster, NCd for this for what I hope are obvious reasons. Blokey bloke type here, by the way.
Have posted about my batshit MiL before - she was the evil piece of work that lied to me about DW wanting company at hospital appointments (DW didn't and was happy to go solo) which resulted in my having to make last minute arrangements to accompany DW while at the same time MiL was telling DW how controlling I was. In a nutshell.
Anyway, it all came to a head 7 years 9 months ago when MiL and her lickspittle partner ignored DWs request not to come around. Came around and assaulted me. DW and I have been NC with her ever since (I did call the police).
However, we had a teenage son, and felt it wasn't our place to dictate whether he saw his nan or not. So he's carried on visiting for the past 7 years, despite it being increasingly unpleasant.
Until a couple of days ago when his Nan went apeshit with him for various reasons and "disowned" him. So he's very upset (he's a very caring lad) but in his own words (to DW) "I can't believe how nasty she is. No wonder you and Dad wanted nothing to do with her."
I know this is garbled and confused and I apologise, and I have to warn I might not be able to update. But I just wanted to give out a metaphorical shout from the mountain top that the day DW and I knew would have to come has come. 7 years 9 months after we went NC.
And if it hadn't been for the fantastic wonderful wise empathetic and compassionate hivemind of Mumsnet, DW and I would never have made sense of narcissism or controlling behaviour, FOG, DARVO, and all the other hallmarks and traits of dysfunctional relationships.
Many years ago, I posted the story above (about hospital apps). I then name changed and posted another story about MiLs batshit behaviour and a poster here commented that they'd only ever heard one other story so batshit - which was my original. So my MiL holds the honour of being so batshit their behaviour was distinct across namechanges.
Anyway back to life and helping DS process this all. In the meantime whoever and wherever you are, a thank you to one and all for just being, since in the absence of therapy, MN has been a lifeline. may all your days go well.
(DW has poor eyesight so finds posting hard, hence me being the mouthpiece).