I am having some issues with my boyfriend of one year. For context, I am 30 and he is 31. We have fun together but that's all it seems to be - fun. He can't seem to talk about anything serious without making a joke of it. An example: I was very upset this weekend because we keep having little arguments that could be avoided with better communication. He point blank refused to talk to me about it at the weekend and when I brought it up yesterday he joked that I am an 'emotional terrorist' and he 'doesn't negotiate with terrorists'. Before I went over to his yesterday I asked if I could bring anything and he joked 'an emotionally stable version of yourself'.
I don't know whether I am overreacting but I would just like to be taken seriously and for him to indicate that he cares about my feelings. He also refuses to talk about the future with me.
He was single for 6 years before me and perhaps this explains his behaviour - he just doesn't know how to be in a relationship. My worry is that if we can't have honest conversations about our relationship without him constantly deflecting, we won't be able to deal with issues as they arise and that is not a recipe for a healthy relationship.
Does anyone else have experience of this or advice in overcoming it? There are lots of good things about our relationship but I feel that being able to talk about issues and having feelings and emotions validated is fundamental to a successful relationship and that it's not a good sign that he can't seem to recognise this.