I actually think internet dating is a great idea and know of many people who have found lasting happy relationships this way.
I signed up on a good site a few months ago and only got as far as reading a few of the messages as I just couldn’t face taking it any further. But a week ago I replied to 3 messages from nice sounding men.
I’m wary of endless messaging so was pleased when all 3 of them gave me their phone numbers. It nearly killed me to do it as I’m an introvert and quite shy, but I called 1 of them, left a message and he called me back. We got on well so he suggested meeting up for a walk at 10.30am (no idea why he wanted to meet so early). A lovely guy and we got on really well but he had said he was 5ft 9 but he was more like 5ft 6, so this was a deal breaker for me.
I had given the second guy my number so he sent me a few messages. Most men love to message endlessly but won’t pick up the phone so I bit the bullet, again it nearly killed me, and called him. He was wanting to schedule in a time to call, and I just think, oh pick up the phone already. Again he was a nice enough guy but wanted to schedule in a Zoom call before meeting – he said he wouldn’t meet anyone in person until the government lifted restrictions. Having gone on about how healthy he was I thought it utterly wet to wait till utterly useless Boris and Matt Hancock decide it’s possible for healthy adults to meet up. So now I’ve got to compose a polite message saying I don’t think we’re compatible and no doubt will receive a cross message in return.
I gave the third man my number and again, endless messages – even sending me a map of his latest cycling trip, and could we schedule in a Zoom call? Why can’t he just pick up the phone? The thought of scheduled telephone calls makes me feel like I’m having a job interview. I know quite a lot of people don’t like speaking on the phone and they find it very invasive and intrusive so I suppose each to their own. But we’re in our 50’s/60’s so speaking on the phone shouldn’t be a huge stretch – they are all perfectly happy to be rung but they won’t actually ring themselves.
I was once pursued by a nice-sounding friend of a friend on FB, he endlessly asked for my number and when I gave it to him, just started texting… I have no idea why he bothered switching from messaging on FB to messaging on the phone.
The first guy was great, just picked up the phone and planned a meeting but the height thing is a deal breaker, though I hope we can stay in touch as friends.
I’ve only dealt with 3 of them but already I feel wiped out and emotionally exhausted. Online dating is a full time job.
Just wanted to ruminate really and ask if anyone has had positive experiences. It’s only been a few days and already I feel like Charlotte in Sex in the City who shrieked, “I’ve been dating all my life and I’m exhausted!”