OLD Etiquette

[PartyCat]

Just a quick one - I have just signed up to Match.com and have got a couple of messages. What is the etiquette if not interested in them at all; just ignore or a polite reply saying thanks but no thanks, although that nearly seems worse than ignoring? What is 'the done thing'?

I do a bit of both. If someone has put a lot of effort into a message I'll answer saying no thanks. Other crappy messages I just ignore.

Just ignore. Some guys take any response as a show of interest and life’s just too short. Plenty just knock out a “how’s you?” to basically any woman with a pulse. Don’t feel bad about ignoring messages that took about 1/10 of a second’s thought and effort.

I really just wouldn’t respond

Just ignore.

Ignore.

I'm with Dunking

If it's a proper message that refers to your profile etc then I'd reply saying thanks but no thanks. When it was just "how's u?" or similar, or an obvious c&p - lengthy but doesn't refer to 'you' or your profile - then I would just ignore.

Many men will send out so many messages to so many women (cast their net far and wide) that they won't remember you or that they sent you a message. They've just looked at your photo and thought, "would I fuck that or not". And, if they conclude that they would, they send a "how's u?" type message. They send hundreds of them.

I agree with pp, if they've put effort in their message I'd politely reply but if they just say 'How's u?' then the message gets deleted and they get blocked.

The problem in saying "thanks but no thanks" is sometimes you'll get a nasty reply, like "I was just going to pity-fuck you anyway you're so [insert insult]". So personally I'd just ignore the ones you're not interested in.

I never had a response like that, category12!

I think you can often judge from the tone of the message tbh if they're that sort of person. I only ever had replies thanking me for replying and wishing me well.

You need a thick skin for OLD as I have discovered
Some men are just nasty I had one start a ‘conversation’ with ‘ you’ve had three kids how can you say your perfect ‘
Plus the ton of ‘hi beautiful’ type messages

Just ignore. And / or never be afraid to block them

If someone has put time into a nice message that is clearly tailored to me, ie references something in my profile I will say 'thank you for the message, I'm not interested but I hope you find what you're looking for'