Not sure if my partner is cheating

[Jordimum]

I got a call from someone telling me that my other half has been sleeping with his wife. I didn’t confront my partner straight away because I wanted evidence and waited until he was out to call back. Anyway, the person gave me screenshots of messages between him and his wife and it’s my partners picture and number. I also looked at the dates and it was when I was working (my partner works shifts so is at home a lot during the day).

I ended up confronting him and he says he’s been set up and that it’s his jealous ex girlfriend. I’ve been cheated on before in the past badly and he says I need to trust him and he’s not my ex.

What do you think? Am I being naive if I believe him? Or am I being oversensitive because of my past relationship?

How long are you with him ?

Can he explain how the ex got details of when you were out?

What is your gut saying?

Was it the woman’s male partner who rang you?

If so, how could it be her who set your partner up?

What is he saying his jealous ex has done? Faked the messages?

I haven’t told him that it has his number and picture because I don’t want to give everything away.

It was the woman’s male partner and he sounded genuinely devastated.

How did this person who 'set him up' get his number on the texts?

Is there anyone with a grudge against you who would do this? It was a man who phoned you right? So it obviously isnt his ex.

I'm sorry op but I think he has cheated and is bullshitting his way out. It seems you've got another wrongun on your hands unfortunately.

Surely if this was his jealous Ex masquerading as him to lure in a married woman, the whole thing would have fallen apart as soon as they met, and no 'sleeping' with anyone would have taken place?

If the male partner is certain that a physical affair has taken place, or that the female partner has confirmed it, then it's not a jealous Ex, is it?

How is he explaining his photo and number? Photoshop? That's an awful lot of trouble for an ex to go through. As well as getting a male friend/boyfriend to get involved and phone you.

I mean it's possible, but a huge stretch. How long ago did he date this jealous ex? And she's just appeared from nowhere after all this time?

Plus the jealous ex wouldn’t know the dates of when you are working.

What does your gut feeling say? The ex girlfriend would have to be pretty bloody good to be able to set up the screenshots and a devastated bloke.

Isn't there another thread just like this?

So sorry this must be very difficult. The screen shots would be hard to explain away, why would someone go to all that trouble to fake that and invoke their current husband? Not saying that’s not possible just seems out there.

It's funny these sorts always have 'jealous' exs isn't it? Like all their exs are crazy, obsessive and out to get them xD

I don’t think it is photoshop because he has changed his number since that ex. I know I’m probably being naive and hoping for someone to say it didn’t happen :(. Just so devastated that I’ve ended up with another cheat :(.

He's lying to you. Trust your gut.

There are plenty of vindictive recent exes of both sexes around, they just don't usually extend their behaviour to the extremes of impersonating their former partner, or still display bizarre obsessive behaviour years and years down the line.

Has he mentioned a 'jealous ex' before ever? Or has she conveniently popped up to explain away the screenshots?

He's lying, and also trying to turn it round on you. You're not being unreasonable- you have proof so you know you're not being unduly irrational.

I would show him the number and pic, so he knows you've thoroughly caught him out.

If he tries to say it's a set up then, I think he really must disrespect you and think you're stupid.

you've got more proof than most women who come on here suspecting their partners of cheating do.
I suspect he'll talk you round as you so badly want to believe him.

When we first got together she used to call him all the time as he ended things badly with her. She used to call from friends numbers when he blocked her. But we haven’t heard anything from her in like two years!

Yeah...nothing worse than getting a present in sparkly wrapping and a bow only to unwrap it and find it's yet another box full of shit (...out of context this would sound like my christmases are awful xD).

I think the old saying that if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it's a duck applies here unfortunately.

Sorry sorry op :(

How long have you been with him? Why would a crazy ex just show up now?

so how is the other woman's partner involved in this if it was 'fake'?

I'd be very concerned about how he got your number OP! That's quite creepy. It would make a bit of sense if he had your partner's number but to have yours is a whole other ballgame. Sounds like such a mess, so sorry

Who is the woman thr guy claims is involved? Has he kicked her to the kerb? Does she have a fb?

I'd just text the fella 'hey so my bf says you are working in conjunction with his crazy ex. Does your partner have a fb? I wont message her, just would help to prove she is real. And not his ex. If not, no worries'