Married & left with unborn child

[mysha98]

Hi guys

Pls tell me if I've done the right thing or not..

The past two days myself and a good friend of mine have been trying to get in contact with my ex that had an arranged marriage behind my back.

My ex got married we never spoke for a good few months then we got back together as I was informed he had left her we slept together and I end up pregnant.

He then disappears and I find out he's still with his wife.. months go on and I try to get in contact with him but he doesn't acknowledge my presence one bit. His phrase was "silence is power"

So yesterday I have been trying to contact him and so has my friend as he really wanted this baby and promised he'd be in the child's life. I contacted him on insta and after I've sent him messages all he's done is block me so I tried to contact him through my friend and he done the same to her.

We contacted his wife on insta aswell as she knows he cheated on her in the past but my friend and myself have just been blocked time and again from the wife too. Now the wife isn't from the Uk. She's from Iraq and he's told me she doesn't know English that well and from her bio I can kind of see that and I believe he's just made up loads of lies about me and made me out to be a psycho.

I tried messaging his wife today on another account just to speak to my ex about his child and I've been blocked each time within a few mins..

I just need advice and please be nice but be brutally honest.

My only question: if he's so controlling, why do you want him in your child's life?

Better no father than a shit father! And I say this as someone who was raised by a single mum with no contact from my father. I had a happy childhood and have a happy life now. No one 'needs' a parent who is going to be controlling, lie and ignore them when things aren't going their way because "silence is power".

Also, i don't understand this obsession with "father figures". Forcing a twat to be a father when you know he doesn't give a shit is far, far more damaging to a child than growing up without a father.
^
totally

Right few things.
Get an abortion and go forward and meet someone who wants a child with u?
Spec as u have no support.

2ndly keep going on and you may end up an honour killing or something like this. Your very young but u will grow up soon enough this man doesnt want u or your baby. He has his wife and is doing his family buissness some men like this see uk women as easy and practice. They chose a wife from home as they hate western ways and wants what they want when they want it. Now leave his wife alone and book a gp appointment if it isnt to late either this or be happy to be a single mum

I have a lot of Iraqi friends including men. I am English female. I am pretty certain that they told me that any children are the property of the men. If a woman leaves her husband or divorce etc, the man gets the children. So do not put him on the birth certificate or the child could end up in iraq. Also be aware many Iraqi men try to get English girls pregnant in order to obtain citizenship or get other family members here via having a grandchild here etc. Take care xx

@SharkAttack1972
In Islam if a wife divorces her husband the children are meant to live with the father, this is so no other man can bring up the children, only blood related males are supposed to be in the same household. This very rarely happens as the fathers can't be a stay at home parent. It's unlikely the father would take the child as they are not married and will be born out of wedlock.

@fuckinghellthisshit

No she came here 10 years ago. They are both the same age (mid 20's)

I was living alone when I met him

To be honest, I wouldn't even bother with child support, as it could just be an avenue for him to be in your child's life, which I don't think is beneficial to anyone...least of all you and your child.

The CS isn't worth the hassle .