Just received solicitor’s email

[KnottedStomach]

I just received an email from a solicitor saying thanks for our chat yesterday (we didn’t chat). It was sent to me and DH. It sounds like he was trying to get finances in order before initiating a split. He talked about protecting his death in service benefit, trying to say that he contributed to my parents house (untrue) and trying to protect that money. We lent them 40% of the amount he says he gave and they have already paid half back.

I replied to the solicitor copying in DH. I’m in bed with Coronavirus. He’s upstairs working. I’m waiting for a massive showdown and I’m scared.

I don’t think he would hurt me but he’s very intelligent, persuasive and can be verbally aggressive/insistent.

I’m really scared.

honestly call the solicitor on Monday.

Everything about this screams that it is wills and estate planning for wills.

just as your DH said.

I k ow someone who inherited 3 months after the divorce and finance were sorted, the ex was laughed at by both solicitors
They got nothing.

1. Get better
2. Get a solicitor/initial legal advice
3. Get shot
4. Get even, if you can. Not in a malicious way, but make sure your solicitor gets you everything you're entitled to.

He sounds like an absolute peach, not. You poor thing. What an underhand, mean-spirited thing to do.

I'm tempted to suggest giving him a BIG hug, breathing at him, and whispering, "The Lannisters send their regards" although this might not be looked upon altogether favourably by a solicitor....Hope you get it sorted.

Your; poor DH. You do not trust him and people replying here are whipping uop a frenzy

His story adds up FFS.

Would be worth getting hold of or copies of any key documents that relate to the matters you mention. Certainly worth speaking to some of your family or friends to appraise them of the situation. If he gets aggressive (verbally or otherwise) I would record and then transcribe it later given that you are probably not feeling great. Might be worth doing some research on good local divorce lawyers and see how they work in lockdown as it sounds like you need your own chat! Certainly don't confront him and try and sit it out until you have the info you need.

Are you sure he wasn't just discussing Wills with the solicitor given the fact your poorly and he potentially could also be. He was discussing nominating a specific person for his death in service benefits to go to rather than letting it pass via the Will for inheritance tax purposes (a very common thing to do) and the solicitor needed info regarding cash/assets (current/expected) to determine if any inheritance tax is likely on death and ways of protecting assets/cash from it. The fact the solicitor has copied you into the email indicates your husband may have been discussing mirror Wills (i.e., both yours and his are the same) so the solicitor was keeping you in the loop on the discussions on the assumption your husband had now spoken to you about their chat. I think you've jumped the gun regards his intentions.

If the solicitor got your name incorrect it is entirely possible that he got the money wrong as well.

Of course, if a clearly abusive spouse fetches up with plans to get money out of not dead inlaws, make decisions unilaterally about child guardianship, pensions and the like, and when asked 'oh yes, my wife is fine with all this, she's just not available today, she'll sign it all and send it straight back', a suspicious solicitor being diligent in ensuring these plans are not a surprise/secret/precursor to asking for a ventilator to be switched off would naturally provide the absent spouse with a copy of everything they were apparently agreeing to.

Good point Littlemiss about the 250k possibly being 25. As for expecting inheritance from your parents, even you, their child cannot expect to inherit from them.

If you have loans in place and die that does need to be put into your will.

OP I'd call this professional misconduct by the solicitor.

I fail to see how anyone acting for a sole client- your husband- could copy you in or why your husband would give your details.

Why would your husband give your email address when he was supposedly asking about leaving you?

Is this solicitor really a solicitor or someone who runs a will -writing business - for which you need no legal training?

A genuine solicitor would not contact a spouse about a confidential issue like a pending separation.

something is not right in your story, either you are confused or have jumped to the wrong conclusions.

wills solicitor - hmm free from work - there are a lot of companies who "do" wills but aren't technically solicitors - check
solicitors.lawsociety.org.uk/
& it will show who they are & give you some idea what you are up against
you can also look up divorce lawyer on this site locally (read the instructions carefully you need one who is specialist in this) who may well give you a short interview for either a low amount or even sometimes free - its really worthwhile doing this - cover yourself & your children & parents

Whilst from what other posters say (I have no idea) he isnt trying to shaft you, I would be considering my options. It doesnt sound like there is any trust in your relationship and he sounds pretty awful. Rethink once you recover dont burn your boats unless you want to!

Of course OP doesn't trust him. They've talked about splitting, and now he's gone off to consult a solicitor, without her knowledge, to discuss what will happen to everything in case they die. Without agreeing important points with her first. Without acting like they're a team of parents, even if eventually they split. What happens to their children if they both die is a decision they BOTH need to agree on, not just him. How the money is handled if the BOTH died needs to be a decision they BOTH agree on.

He was sneaky, seemed to be looking for a way to claw at money he's not entitled to for himself, all while his wife is recovering from the virus.

I did a similar thing a while ago, although I had told my DH that we needed to sort out wills! I spoke to a wills company, they sent us both an email about that conversation which we both looked at. After we then discussed it together, we emailed back and she drafted out mirror wills, emailed us a couple of times then sent us the wills to get them signed.
What your DH has done sounds pretty standard to me. Have you never discussed wills? I'd be surprised seeing as you sound like you're quite wealthy. I'd speak to your DH and tell him that you'll go through the details once you feel better, email the company with the same info.

Sounds like he's trying to pull a fast one. Not nice when your poorly 😩

You should have the loan documented. It would have had to be part of the mortgage and the solicitor’s would have noted it. My parents gave is some money towards our house, and the lender required a signed letter and solicitor’s required a letter and a form to document it as part of the sale. You should also have bank statements to prove the transfer and repayment.

If you do get a divorce op, make sure you get a clean break agreement so that your dh can't claim any inheritance down the line.

@HedgehogHotel

The problem with your point is that no matter what's agreed, once the first parent dies, the surviving one can change their will. You can draw up mirror wills, but then one parent can make another one secretly to override the mirror will. The chances of a couple dying at exactly the same time are pretty remote, and regarding the rules of inheritance, if they did, say in a car crash where the deaths were instant, legally the younger of the two would be deemed to have died second.

Could it be a scam?
They are very professional.

Scammers, not solicitors.🙂

It sounds like a will. When I saw a solicitor about my split, and later my divorce, they both said they wouldn't touch finances until childcare was sorted. They took vague figures off me, but then finances were not mentioned again for about 9 months until child access arrangements were put in place. I think if it were a split, there'd be far more in that email regarding his plans for custody/access than just what would happen if he died.

Has your husband seen the email you’ve sent to the solicitor yet? I’m assuming when he does he will come and talk to you about it?

What did you say to the solicitor?

Bloody hell OP

Ah just seen page 4 of 4! Will read back!