DP accidentally forwarded me porn

[lockeddownlockedout]

DP and I don't live together. We've been together six years. This morning, first message of the day from him, I received a video from him that he'd accidentally forwarded to me.

It had two very slim attractive (naked) women in it. I'm feeling very fat and awful at the moment.

The video had been sent to him and he had intended to forward it to a group chat with his friends.

I watch porn myself but I just feel really annoyed/upset/grossed out by it.

AIBU?

So many typos

That would have been passed round at the speed of light by loads of women

You know some "interesting" women then.

The only people I know who's be interested in men penetrating themselves while bouncing would be gay men - and even some of them wouldn't want to see it.

Are these the sane ones that send each other the most extreme disgusting porn they can find?

They sound like a highly representative, well adjusted group.

Where would you see a bloke doing something hilarious with his cick without going looking for it?

God knows where my mates get half their shit from, I have never cared enough to ask. But yep, if blokes were bouncing round on spacehoppers with dildos up their arses it would definitely get passed round.

Its a valid point about coercion, but that applies to porn across the board and the OP watches porn, so clearly that isn't the issue for her here. It's about the women being objectified in a laddish way. But honestly, I know so many women who do the same about men. If not more so actually, now I think about it.

@SirChing the women you know must be so different from any women I’ve ever met!

I know what you are trying to say. Harmless fun?

Not everyone sees it like that. In fact most people don’t see it as harmless or fun. For me it would mean the man is either dodgy or so immature that I wouldn’t see him as relationship material.

I think he needs to grow up and some of these ‘women’ who regularly send porn to each other, apparently, also need to grow up.

Are these the sane ones that send each other the most extreme disgusting porn they can find?

No because that was a different poster and we obviously don't only know the same people These are school mums, teachers, IT consultants, solicitors, all manner of professional women in their thirties and forties. But yes, they would definitely share it in a WTF way.

They do need to grow up then. It’s really offensive to send something seriously offensive. Wtf to that I’d say!

Not everyone sees it like that. In fact most people don’t see it as harmless or fun

And that's fine. But I bet they also don't watch porn themselves then if they have such an issue with it.

This is about the OP watching porn but being upset at her bloke sending porn to his mates. Because wanking over these women would be better than laughing over the ridiculousness of the situation, according to her.

I am simply pointing out that SOME women do do the same, so it isn't solely a male preserve, and that watching ANY porn objectifies, so they are double standards at play here.

StayinginSummer Its really offensive in your opinion.

It’s not an opinion. Porn is offensive, seriously. Would you send it on a work email? Why not?

Because it is objectively offensive.

And sending this stuff to a wide group is very silly and offensive.

@SirChing I do agree if she’s watching porn herself then they both need to grow up and stop using harmful materials, to get their kicks or send to mates. Yes I don’t see it as too different tbh.

Women really pass around porn in Whatsapp groups like sleazy blokes do? That’s really bloody depressing and ick. I honestly can’t imagine any of my very varied groups of friends doing that or thinking it was acceptable or ‘fun’ in any way. I think they’d all feel it was a bit classless and weird. Personally I think sending sexual content to mates is just plain creepy and desperate.

Don't see this as a problem

Cool story @ScissorsBike

OP does.

Porn is offensive, it causes offense.

If it doesn't cause offense at all to a person to watch others having sex or being degragraded I'd wonder what mental gymnastics are needed to think it's OK to watch?

It must involve some level of objectification IMHO.

I find it sad if women are passing it around.

You say it's the context and laddy aspect of the porn that's the issue.
My friend (female) sometimes sends me weird things about penises etc. lol that I suppose are the equivalent of that kind of women on space hoppers thing.

I don't think she puts much thought into it, just happens to come across these things, laughs and wants to pass them on to others.

*No because that was a different poster and we obviously don't only know the same people hmm"

I didn't check the username because I thought it unlikely that two posters on Mumsnet knew a group of such weirdos .. but there you go, nowt as strange as folk

@GilbertMarkham They may be weirdos in your eyes, but I doubt they would ever be obnoxious enough to make personal attacks against you.