Wife no longer interested?

[Lovelearn]

Hi, thought the best place to ask this question is where people must have similar experiences.

I met my wife a decade ago, me an elder virgin and her more experienced and going through a divorce partially because she was not being sexually happy and wanting children. From the beginning I felt she adored me and I fell for her. We had a great sex life and have 3 fab children as a result but a year or two after the last child she lost interest in sex.

I have always been a hands on dad and as a light sleeper I always got up with the children to give her a good night's sleep as well as looking after the kids on weekends etc so don't think she is upset about me pulling my weight but she no longer touches me like she used too, no longer seems to need me physically and we have become a once a month couple if lucky. I tried talking, offering to spice things up, buying lingerie but no improvement.

What are the chances this will pass and how long does it last?

@Scott72

@WavescrashingonthebeachI do get the impression from OP that that he has taken the pressure off her and tried helping out around the house.

With the greatest of respect, my experiences of witnessing my parents, and living it with ex partners, men sometimes think in their mind that they are doing more than they are. Im not suggesting this is the case, just my own personal experience.

@Lovelearn you sound like a better man than most of the men we write about on here! You sound kind and supportive. Any woman would be lucky to have you from what you've written in this thread.

I would suggest opening to your wife and explaining how you a lack of sex is making you feel, then ask her how she feels too. There might be a reason for her lack of desire, whether it's body image, lack of attraction or feeling overwhelmed at work.

Depending on the outcome of the conversation you may want to try other ways to spice up the relationship. There are lots of great ideas that can be tried (aside from buying lingerie). Maybe discuss some of the options she which (if any) take her fancy then proceed!

steamygenie.com/blog/12-kinky-ideas-to-spice-up-your-sex-life/

BIWI

You've had three children in ten years. You also only help with the children at the weekend

WTF?

He's the one who gets up with the children every night so that his wife gets all the sleep she needs.

She's clearly the selfish one - leave her and find a woman you're sexually compatible with.

Thanks for some positive posts and advice. I love my wife and family so will keep working to recover the frequecy of great sex we used to have.

I have found thinking/obsessing about it less helps and knowing when it does happen it's wonderful.

Thanks again