Husband out now, forgot his phone, illegal to view his texts?

[SheilaBGoingSoon]

I swear something it going on n he never usally leaevs his phone an i think i know the unlock pattern thingy... is it illegal for me to look?

thanks!

If you suspect an affair have a look

Stop taunting us and just look👀

Going through private messages is illegal. The offence is dependent on the type of message that you’re looking at ( email for example). Whether someone would report you for a one off case is another matter. I can definitely see that being used as evidence towards coercive control though. A person being caught in an affair may well make a report about it just to have you go through the inconvenience of being investigated. ( the same way men who are violent will report their partner if they so much as lift a finger towards them). I would think about why you’re tempted to do it.

Damn right I’d look if I thought he was having an affair! I can’t believe anyone wouldn’t unless they wanted to bury their head in the sand and pretend it wasn’t happening. I respect my partners privacy and have never looked through his phone in the 10 years we’ve been together,, but wouldn’t fucking hesitate if I thought he was lying and disrespecting me by cheating.

@eenymeenyminyme same here. My ex gaslighted me and the only way I found out was looking at his phone for concrete evidence...and found it. I also remember my hands shaking when I took photos for evidence. I'll never regret doing it and will never apologise either. It enabled me to get rid of him from my life.

Either you trust him or you don't. If you no longer trust him, then the relationship is dead regardless of any evidence or absence thereof. Just end it.

I'm as sure as I can be that no one has ever been thrown in jail for looking at their husbands phone.

Bloody hell, you must have a will of iron if you suspect your husband is up to something, have unrestricted access to his phone and are not going to snoop. Hats off to you OP.

Personally I would look and I think most other people would too, despite what they say.

I can’t believe anyone would be so scared of looking - I wouldn’t care if dh looked at my phone either.
Have a quick nosy before he gets back!

I'd look only if I knew that my marriage would be over the moment I did. Because if you don't trust somebody enough to not look on their phone it's over, and if it is over then having proof of an affair can be helpful

If the Police aren't standing over your shoulder watching you, then do it.

FFS how will he know?!

If I thought my DH was up to something, I'd do it.

Not illegal, I wouldn't look though- simply because I know they will all be mostly work related ( they pay for his phone) and beyond dull.

Not illegal ffs.
Go for it.
Why would you live with someone who carries around a secret handheld computer.
For context I found out my exs affair from his phone.
I don't see why it has to be a secret and that's fine with everyone. It's like enabling. They might as well shag with ease if is considered a worse offence that we might check.

No it is not illegal or even really immoral. If DH wanted to trawl through mine I couldn’t care less, they’re boring as shit anyway! If you have nothing to hide this really isn’t an issue.

If you suspect he’s cheating, then trust your instinct and of course you should check. If you’re just bored or nosey, do something else

Do it if you have doubts OP. It’s less immoral than adultery ☹️

So what happens if you look and you don't find anything remotely suspicious?

I'm guessing you'll still have a "feeling".

So why not just do whatever you'd do if you found out he was having an affair, without bothering with the middle step? If you can't trust him, the relationship is doomed anyway.

You would just be seeking the truth surely. No moral dilemma in my book.

It was the only way I found out. Otherwise I could have wasted another 8 years of my life with him.

You'll find another way to what?

If his phone has no pin on it then he has little to hide. Do you suspect he is cheating or flirting?

What's bother you atm?

A partner of mine 10 years ago would grab my mobile phone from my hand and look in it, keeping me at arm's length until he was satisfiend with what he found (calls and messages etc. it was not a smart phone) and I can happily say he became my ex shortly after that.

OP you have to do what feels right I suppose. Not illegal as far as I know but not sure about it. Despite my first paragraph if I strongly suspected a partner or husband was having an affair then yes I would take a look.

theres other stuff. i don't need to know more. i'm out

ok.

If he was up to something wouldn't he have panicked and come back for his phone?

I never looked at my ex's phone when she was cheating, but it was enough to see how much she was guarding it to suspect something was up. If she had left it at home by accident she would have been back in a shot!

Good!
You clearly don't trust him.
You know he's up to something.
Get out fast and move on with our life!