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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Does he like me?

7 replies

Babybundle007 · 15/02/2020 13:45

I can't tell if this guy at work likes me. He's made occasional flirty comments in the past but in his general manner he's quite serious. He's slightly older than me. He's also in a more senior position. I have always considered him as a work friend, he's given me some good advice in the past and he's very straight-forward in his approach. I've known him for a few years.

He can be blunt in his manner and quite a few people in the office find him cold and standoffish and I must say, he doesn't naturally invite conversation. But he's very odd with me sometimes. If I'm hot-desking elsewhere, he'll text me saying the Team is missing me, and asks me where I am. He makes jokes, but then straightens the conversation up by reprimanding me over something minor. He has said I've "got the looks," and comments like that. And he seems to approve if I sit near him.

He's just a bit odd in his approach. I can't actually work out if he's interested or not? We are friends, and we can have a laugh. I've recently noticed that he mirrors things I say. And he has held my hand once when I cried at work! Maybe he was just being nice. I really can't work him out. He does like to tell me off though! It's very strange. Any thoughts?

OP posts:
assilem92 · 15/02/2020 13:46

That's hard to read, I wouldn't go there though - especially if he's in a more senior position

Sadolmeee · 15/02/2020 14:18

Is he already with someone ?

Hepsibar · 15/02/2020 14:49

Very unprofessional of him to be making flirty comments, especially in a senior position. You dont want to be the next notch on his bedpost.

opticaldelusion · 15/02/2020 15:00

You've 'got the looks'? Sleazy. Especially from an older fella in a senior position at work.

HannaYeah · 15/02/2020 15:02

Sounds like he might. But I wouldn’t do anything. If you are interested and he asks you out, then keep in mind it will make work awkward if things don’t work out. It’s a risk and you have to decide if it’s worth having to find a new job.

PicsInRed · 15/02/2020 15:10

He combines sleazy compliments with tellings off?

He sounds deeply toxic and an abusive boyfriend in the making. This is the sort of guy who will turn very controlling and then attempt to ruin your life if you have the audacity to leave him - particularly a risk here as he works with and is senior to you.

I'd quietly distance myself, remain polite and friendly but distant. I would ready myself for needing to find a new job in the worst case scenario.

category12 · 15/02/2020 15:13

Sounds like you need to date, but not him.

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