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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

The best way to turn down right or flight?

87 replies

Movingon83 · 15/02/2020 09:33

Hi,
I’m dealing with the after effects of trauma. My brain is making my body unwell from what I’ve learnt is living in constant flight mode.

What is the best way to give by body a break? I’m hoping that if I give my body a break my mind will strengthen.

I’ve signed up for counselling but in the meantime....do I really need to medicate myself?

OP posts:
Movingon83 · 15/02/2020 13:24

I find it hard in the day to do much for myself as my little boy requires so much of my attention. He also has a few health problems so doesn’t sleep great either Confused

OP posts:
Movingon83 · 15/02/2020 13:26

I feel I release the adrenaline by getting frustrated with inane things or by living in my mind because I can’t escape physically.

OP posts:
category12 · 15/02/2020 13:30

If you could externalise it, it would be healthier than internalising. So like a bit of primal screaming Smile or quick sprint down the street, running down a hill with your ds and yelling, jumping on cardboard boxes, that kind of thing? We're physical beings.

Movingon83 · 15/02/2020 13:46

Yes I do kind of take it out on the cardboard boxes at work. That feels good!

OP posts:
Movingon83 · 15/02/2020 13:48

I’m trying to bring one thought into my mind at a time and think about it with reason instead of just feeling scared about the thought. Its hard and exhausting.

OP posts:
DuchessDumbarton · 15/02/2020 13:51

Have a look at the Beacon House Clinic website...they have some lovely resources (heavily influenced by van der Kolk).

You need to constantly give your brain a sensory message that you are safe- talking wont do it yet.
Lots of comfy small spaces, rhythmic swinging, calming music smells and lights.

Movingon83 · 15/02/2020 13:52

There is a thought which I’m stuck on. Did I bring this upon myself. I came into the relationship 12 years ago with anxiety (no way near as bad). Did he punish and get annoyed with me because he was sick of my anxiety. Or did he keep me in an anxious state so that I felt I couldn’t escape and he was in control. I then think why didn’t he just leave me, his response was he loved me too much. I guess this thought is the crutch of all of this.

OP posts:
RJnomore1 · 15/02/2020 13:55

I was going to suggest actually running too. Use up the adrenaline and also use the run to be mindful - count your steps, your breath, be aware of how your body feels?

Ohyesiam · 15/02/2020 14:00

Google ways of increasing vagal tone( which is the same as decreasing your fight/flight response).
There are really simple things like breathing techniques along with more costly therapies.
Hope you find something that helpsFlowers

Arion · 15/02/2020 14:11

Van der Kolk's book is good. Also Pete Walker’s Complex PTSD, or Janina Fisher’s website has articles on trauma and treatment.

The first stage you’re looking at in therapy will be stabilisation, this is done through the relationship with a reliable other (your therapist) but there are steps you can take.

Look at information on lowering cortisol - basically fight/flight - you have an overly responsive amygdala firing warning signals, this releases cortisol, excess cortisol increases the size of the amygdala which then releases even more cortisol - vicious cycle. Look at lowering cortisol by trying to get decent sleep, relax, reduce caffeine and alcohol intake. Small steps have a cumulative effect. I find journaling and music helps me (I bullet journal and The Mighty website has some good playlists).

I’m in my 3rd year of training as a psychotherapist, but I’ve been through it myself. Happy to talk further with you about what helped me.

Herocomplex · 15/02/2020 14:16

Chances are he took advantage of you, he’s made himself feel better by making you more vulnerable. Is there anyone who listens to you when you need to talk? You know the Samaritans will be there for you if you just want to get the thoughts out?
Our friends often mean well, but sometimes it’s hard for people to just listen.

Movingon83 · 15/02/2020 14:50

I don’t even know why I need to know who was wrong and who was right. The relationship was toxic and it’s over from my side.

OP posts:
Despolime · 15/02/2020 14:56

I have read the full thread, but didn't want to not comment.

I had similar, OP, and then when I finally accepted that I needed counselling I read about EMDR, and asked for it at the assessment. Perhaps I was lucky, but I got it on the NHS and in a very quick time frame. I was given 6 sessions but only went to two. The terror of feeling on edge halved after the first, and almost disappeared after the second.

I do wish I'd finished the six because I do still get anxious, but not in the same way. Not like I'm always in the fight or flight that you describe.

While I was waiting to accept I needed counselling, I found that exercise, keeping busy and eating keto helped, but absolutely nothing to the extent of EMDR. If you don't know about it, I'd really advise reading up on it.

Despolime · 15/02/2020 15:02

Sorry, just read the whole thing. My trauma was different to yours, but it did involve a man. After I stopped having any contact with this man the speed at which I began to get better really accelerated, I realise this is really difficult for you, because of your son and because you're still married to him, but I just wanted to say that a day will come when you don't need to speak to or see him aside from child related things, and you will start feeling better Flowers

Movingon83 · 15/02/2020 15:23

The problem is not really about seeing him it’s dealing with the head working. I can be scared just as much thinking about him then seeing him. But not seeing him does help. I blocked him on everything but you can’t block your own mind. Well I’ve tried but it doesn’t work:

OP posts:
rvby · 15/02/2020 15:27

So sorry OP.

Some things that worked for me:
Sleeping with a soft, cuddly teddy bear.
Candles, soft rhythmic instrumental music, low light, cuddly warm blankets at all times while at home.
Bought myself comfortable, beautiful soft lounging clothes.
Watching comforting TV shows, e.g. bakeoff.
Journaling. Whenever I got into flight mode I would start to write and keep going until calm arrived. This was huge for me.

Basically treating myself like a small child who was in distress, who needed cuddles and a safe warm nest.

Also lots of exercise. Swimming, boxing, weights, cycling.

And endless walks in the woods. I found that being in nature was probably the #2 most important thing for me, after journaling. My ds was your DS age at the time - we just got outside every Saturday morning and didnt come home until we were exhausted and freezing. It was hugely therapeutic. You do need to have safe spaces to walk though, and to at least have your anxiety stabilized a bit. Alternatively even just going to the local playground and sitting under a tree.

Definitely try medication if you feel it might help. Why not? If it improves your quality of life, awesome. If not, you can stop.

Movingon83 · 15/02/2020 16:22

It’s funny what a lot of you are saying about finding safety. This is the feeling I’ve been searching for. My Netflix is full of romantic comedies. I’ve never been a romantic comedy person, I was a sci-fi or horror person but I can’t watch them at the moment. Or anything on the tv like medical or murder type programs.

OP posts:
Movingon83 · 15/02/2020 17:03

What I find hard to process is the fact that he seems absolutely fine, more than fine. It’s hard to not feel like the problem was me. I know that’s the perception he wants.
Hopefully I will soon really REALLY let this soak in.

OP posts:
Herocomplex · 15/02/2020 19:11

You’re finding it hard to process because it is really hard to process. Your ex sounds like a really damaging person.

Movingon83 · 15/02/2020 19:19

It’s like the chicken or the egg, what came first. I did have problems with my anxiety before meeting him. Did he see me coming and use my vulnerability! I really think so. He used it whenever it suited him. I was totally fine to do everything he wanted, sorting out all his problems. But then something I couldn’t do, bang there is something wrong with you! People who love people help them like I did with him and all his issues. I never used them against him, never in an argument, never to make him feel shame, because I loved him. In return my issues (and we all have issues) where shoved in my face and I was shamed. It was always me apologising and begging. When he admitted blame it was because I made him do it. So yeah, I had anxiety but he trapped me with it! It’s such complicated feelings to get my head around. I was in it for love for 12 years.

OP posts:
Movingon83 · 15/02/2020 19:30

I think I’m trying to force an answer when I’m not capable at the moment of finding one. I’ll just use all these really useful ideas of self love and hopefully I will find one.

OP posts:
inthekitchensink · 15/02/2020 19:39

I have had severe ptsd, these are things that helped, I hope it might be of use to you -

  • medication- sorry I know you don’t want it but made the world of difference to be able to sleep at night, and function during the day
  • lots and lots of talk therapy - cbd, the works
  • books - work books, exercise books, journals
  • self care - shit loads of sleep, rest, calming the adrenaline & cortisone however works for you - try baths, essential oils, yoga, Pilates, dancing, music, meditation
  • hiding - sounds counterproductive but avoiding crowds, parties whatever stressed me out for a while, 3 months, 2 years, whatever you need
  • exercise - pick one & do it 4 times a week
  • booze & drugs do not help, no matter how much you want to escape the pain & intrusive thoughts
BuzzLiteYear · 15/02/2020 20:44

EMDR therapy - I'd heard of this but never really looked into it until now.
I've tried many different therapies but this definitely seems the weirdest ... that's not to say that it doesn't work, just that intuitively it's hard to get my head around it.
In summary it seems to involve recalling a traumatic incident while moving your eyes from side to side (possibly mimicking the rapid eye movement during sleep) by following a finger or lights and somehow this reduces the impact the trauma has over you.
Has anyone tried it and found it beneficial or otherwise?

fectsoftrauma · 15/02/2020 20:58

Someone has mentioned Beacon House org uk upthread, and they have a video on their website about helping someone overcome childhood trauma using EMDR.

OP, in the short term, and this is going to sound ridiculous, but simply by saying to yourself a few times "there is no threat there is no danger" it may help. At the bottom I link a video which is relevant though I haven't checked the credentials it is quite basic info and very easy to understand how things can by pass the thinking brain. I have found that by instructing the brain that there is no threat can help.

If you are suffering terribly then talk to your GP. In terms of medication, something like beta blockers can help turn off the panic giving you space to think things out for yourself, and you would normally be only on them for a couple of months, they work immediately and don't affect hormones or "you". I think it basically does turn off the fight/flight but you do have to deal with everything else. You could also talk to a clinical psychologist who specialises in trauma or like a pp has said you may be lucky with a referral. It sounds as though you have a lot to unpick so long term you might find that helpful.

As far as can understand the science says "name it to tame it" so you overcome the trauma by being able to pinpoint how you feel about an event and your brain can then selfsoothe - that is my very basic understanding though there is a lot of research and a clinical psychologist with relevant expertise would be able to explain better.

Another short term thing that helps provide release is EFT tapping - google and you will find a video where someone explains the technique - it is really good for releasing things - you can "say" what you want while doing it and do it over and over.

The very most effective thing I have ever done to help with this sort of thing is to write it down, exactly what happened with all the detail you can including how you felt, and then read through it - this helps your brain process it and gives you sights. And going through all your emotions - how it made you angry, how it made you afraid, how it made you sad, how it made you feel sorrow. It is hard with a 4 year old to look after but if you have moments to yourself when he is asleep that might be a good time.

This video explains in a really easy way basically what is happening which may help give you understand the role of your thinking brain. I am not sure what the guy's credentials are but it is just basic info and I found it helpful at the start of trying to understand what I could do. But if you feel it is overwhelming you please do seek professional help/talk to your GP. Dan Siegel has some good videos on recovering from trauma, and speaks about "tame it to name it" on youtube.

Lastly, long long walks, really good for both you and your 4 year old in terms of reconnecting the brain, helping the thinking part take control, releasing feel good endorphins.

At some point consider how things may have affected your 4 year old.

Despolime · 16/02/2020 14:40

@BuzzLiteYear I had EMDR, and within two sessions I was 95% better. It was like magic. And I say that as someone who was very reluctant to to have therapy, and didn’t really believe it would help.

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