Fiancé has lost it!!

[Kel9]

Hi ladies...

Looking to rant really. This all sounds so petty.

My oh and I get married soon and we have a good relationship I mean I feel like we are very compatible and I would say soul mates and he’s a laugh a minute. He’s a big joker I mean he jokes all the time he’s even done this with arguments.. which had fucked me off. He will talk about being annoyed with a straight face about something so I get offended or upset then he’s like I’m joking!!! 😡 I’ve learnt to ignore him but it’s like the boy who cried wolf as I never know when he’s serious.

So last night I was up lots with tooth ache and asked him to turn over in bed as I was sore lying a certain way. ( I’m weird I hate facing people when I sleep) He lost it! He was like for fuck sake blah blah I just thought he was having a sleepy rant..... but no! He took offence to this.

This morning he left for work without saying bye and when I called him over he ignored me? 😳

I text him this morning to say have a good day as I didn’t hear from him like I usually do and he text me back with a really blunt response and no kisses saying he was really pissed off and didn’t want to say goodby to me this morning and that was it.

It’s a load of bollocks it’s not like it’s anything major and how he’s acting now has made me pissed off with him. I’ve just text him to say this is out of the blue (his behaviour) and to have a nice day. He’s not responded and I’m not going to either.

This all sounds like petty nonsense. What the hell is going on?!?

So last night I was up lots with tooth ache or I was only up once

TBH, I'd be pissed off if you woke me up to ask me to turn over just because you don't like to sleep facing people.

You can do a lot better than him OP.

That lying thing he does is to control you and stop you from feeling too comfortable or confident.

Fuck that. He’s just an arsehole OP. You’d be seriously dense to stay with him.

I don’t ask him to turn over every time we are in bed, which is why I think he’s acting like a dick head

So why did you do it this time?

I think you might mean pedestal, not pedal stool ...

He sounds like a chore anyway OP- hardly sould mate material is it...being wound up all day because he lacks emotional intelligence and maturity or respect. Clearly he has a temper and I wouldn't be sworn at by a partner.

Sure being woken up isnt nice and in the moment lots would be grumpy but a tantrum the next day from a grown adult is just pathetic attention seeking. I wouldn't indulge it.

He's not a joker...he's a cunt. Do not marry him.

I might have pissed him off but does it require him to act like this?? And ignore me I’d say no!

I love pedal stool

I know I’ve not messaged since this morning but not heard anything either how he is acting is not proportionate or acceptable. What makes it worse is he’s training down south for tonight and I’m working Friday night so I won’t see him until Saturday. So for him to react like this is not on

Love bloody phone pedal stool 😂😂

Look.. I don't know the dynamics of your relationship, what goes on daily, what is said etc... BUT ..this definitely seems like a crappy and immature way to leave a disagreement.

Especially seeing as though you won't see one another till SAT🧐🧐. All he has to text is, look I'm annoyed, we'll talk about it when we see eachother .. blah blah ..

The fact he's been MIA all day is just odd 🤷🏻‍♀️
And he knows you're worrying so.. 😑😑

Also I know I'd be PISSED off being woken up but... come on now.. there are bigger fish to fry than this crap 😑😑

Exactly guys! It’s been all day and he’s not responded.

It’s actually pissing me off knowing he’s just doing it to cause tension.

Sometimes I've woke my other half up in bed to move sides when I can't get comfy.. however he did not then blank me or be nasty the following day.

OP YANBU. He seems mean.

I couldn't be doing with all the fucking about... and behaving like a toddler/teen ... emotional manipulation like this is annoying and exhausting...

I would certainly be considering what Sort of role model that is for my DC and if I want to be around that sort of behaviour ...

I mean I’ve actually said to him in the past that as a couple we need to be wise choose our arguments as he sometimes reacts to things that don’t merit it! Then makes it he didn’t or it wasn’t a big deal. How he deals with things drives me mad he goes silent and shuts me down...but over shite. I’d get it if I was abusive or there was infidelity but nope a simple move over in bed did it!!

Problem is I know it’s hard to ask for advice as you don’t know us but I just need to vent somewhere. To make it worse I’m off work today as it’s a school holiday so I’ve been entertaining my little one and just feel mad at him for letting this grow into something and letting me overthink all day

He sounds awful.

Honestly I remember a time when he had far too much to drink and woke me up by almost spewing on me.... I didn’t fall out with him.., in fact I cleaned his fucking spew and put him in the shower!

I'd tell my DH to fuck off if he woke me up to tell me to turn over because he couldn't sleep. There's a perfectly good sofa downstairs of he's that bothered!

But I probably wouldn't carry out over into the next day.

Between his "jokes" and disproportionate behaviour is suggest he's trying to control your emotions.

Yuck. He’s sounding like less and less of a catch.

I wouldn’t marry him OP. He sounds like an arsehole, which unlike fine wine, won’t improve with age.

God I'd tell him to cop the f--k on and stop behaving like a moody teenager. You shouldn't have to deal with that you're an adult 🙄. Couples fight I get that, and you move on but I hate this crap of one person purposely winding the other up just for a reaction. What a waste of time, apart from anything else. You poor thing you must be so frustrated 😑😑.

He will talk about being annoyed with a straight face about something so I get offended or upset then he’s like I’m joking!!!

This would annoy me and I think you hit the nail on the head with the "boy who cried wolf" - after a few rounds, I'd probably just start assuming he was always joking. Or have some way for him to indicate if it's really serious and it's important. But I wonder if he's somehow thinking that if you know him well, you "should" be able to tell when he's joking or not? He may not know how his humour comes across?

Anyway, I'd stop texting him and talk with him face to face when you're both home. It's really hard to tell if anyone's being unreasonable - you were sick and uncomfortable and he was unsympathetic / he was tired and trying to sleep and you disturbed him. Maybe he's now acting like a child - or maybe he's busy at work/doesn't want to get into it over text. But now you're both upset. Just talk it through - and if he habitually refuses to talk, then I think there's a general/larger problem.

“Joker” doesn’t mean good sense of humour, in fact in his case he’s the type of person who enjoys winding people up then go “only joking!. Can’t you take a joke?” Ie a twat. See also sulky buggers.
Life is too short. (But tell me, is he a “good dad” and “is usually kind?”)

I know I’ve been close to texting him but I’ve not. I’ve still not heard a thing from him. Why should I apologise any more than my message this morning this is now all on him!! I’m actually now fucking livid!!!