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Relationships

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Original poster

Want partner to move in, but he refused to do a joint claim for UC

65 replies

Mummaof2roses · 06/02/2020 14:21

So I've been a single mum for 4 years..

My partner now wants to move in (living with parents so not paying rent or bills atm)

I am currently on UC and only recieve basic for my age and my 2 kids so I said to him he can move in but I have to update my claim to joint, which is no issue for me, he earns too much money so I wont be entitled to anything from UC anyway so I read after 6 months if your wage means your not entitled your claim will be closed. All fine.

BUT he refuses to put his details forward for a joint claim he said whether we get money or not he doesn't want his details to be on the system. He said hes never claimed and never will. So he wants me to just cancel UC but I dont know how or if you can even do that?

Will they let me cancel if I say my partner wants to move in but doesnt want to be on UC?

HELP!

OP posts:

DivGirl · 06/02/2020 14:30

Do you have a job? How will you support yourself? This sounds risky.

As far as I'm aware there is no easy way to close a UC claim, but your job coach would be the one to ask about that.

Original poster

Mummaof2roses · 06/02/2020 14:33

I do yes, financially I'm ok, plus I have extremely supportive parents who have always helped me whenever needed.. I know it may sound risky but I do want a life and a future with this man so if I forever hold off I'll lose out in the long run.

OP posts:

user14572856389 · 06/02/2020 14:39

Why doesn't he want his details on "the system"?

Is he moving in with your parents? Paying rent?

Whynosnowyet · 06/02/2020 14:41

How does he think you will manage financially? Has he agreed to pay towards bills etc?
Is he saying he won't chip in?

Original poster

Mummaof2roses · 06/02/2020 14:44

I have no idea, just doesnt like the idea of his details being on a system somewhere.. I honestly dont get it he just has a major hold up about it. He worried they will contact his work and they will think hes claiming benefits ect... I think it's his lack of understanding the way it works that he doesnt like. I've told him he works 60 hours a week in a good job with a good wage so nothing will change or happen just because his details are on there but he wont have it.

So he will move in with my parents so we can save up and rent somewhere together. My parents are fine with it luckily we have the space and happy for us to be rent free to save

OP posts:

Original poster

Mummaof2roses · 06/02/2020 14:46

So since I've moved home with parents I have very little bills so I will be able to cover all of them, he said that hes wants to provide for me and the kids so will help me wherever I need.

OP posts:

Missarad · 06/02/2020 14:46

Tbh move him in dont do owt with uc as its basically a lodger??

ComtesseDeSpair · 06/02/2020 14:47

Of course you can just close a UC claim - the government aren’t going to force you to receive benefits! You just say your financial circumstances have changed. If you won’t be entitled to anything because his salary means your household income will be too high then there’s no point having an open claim. But presumably he understands he will now be responsible for paying all your bills and taking on your children’s expenses?

LovingLola · 06/02/2020 14:50

So the plan is that he will move in with you and your children in your parents house?
Will he pay them rent or bills?
How long are you with him?

Original poster

Mummaof2roses · 06/02/2020 14:53

@comtesseDeSpair

There is no information on how to close one online and it all reads that you have to stay on it for 6 months under a joint claim.

Yes he does understand that and that is how he wants it...

OP posts:

Waxonwaxoff0 · 06/02/2020 14:55

If you need to claim UC then you're not ok financially. You will have to rely on your partner for money. Will he be giving you access to his bank account?

Original poster

Mummaof2roses · 06/02/2020 14:56

Yes him move in with my parents and niether of us pay rent so we can save and rent somewhere together.

And I've been with him for over a year but his work has been in Leicester so lives there and comes back to his parents at weekends. Now a position has finally opened in the london office so he can move back down this way.

OP posts:

Jaxhog · 06/02/2020 15:00

Surely you wouldn't do that unless he has agreed to contribute at least as much as you'd get through UC?

Josette77 · 06/02/2020 15:02

He's been with you a year and he's offering to move in an financially pay for you and your children?

MaryQContrary · 06/02/2020 15:02

I think you should live with your respective parents until you can afford to rent somewhere together as a family.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 06/02/2020 15:03

So he's moving from his parents (where he doesn't pay rent) to your parents (where he won't pay rent).

Sorry but this sounds incredibly dodgy. Has he not get any savings at all yet? What has he been spending his money on?

Please don't give up your independence at the drop of a hat (a year is nothing). Stay where you are with your UC!

Wishforsnow · 06/02/2020 15:06

I am sure you can call up and cancel your claim due to change in circumstances. I do kind of get where he is coming from. I wouldn't want my details added to the benefits system as I have never needed to claim. Maybe not rational but I'm sure others would be the same.

Turquoisetamborine · 06/02/2020 15:08

It is very easy to close your claim. Just send a journal message to the case manager. You don't have to give a reason. You don't have to leave it open for 6 months either.

LovingLola · 06/02/2020 15:08

How often do you see him?

ChuckleBuckles · 06/02/2020 15:14

My parents are fine with it luckily we have the space and happy for us to be rent free to save

Your parents are happy to provide free housing to a grown man that is in full time employment, in a good job that is completely unrelated and unknown to them? Nuts, just crackers.

Original poster

Mummaof2roses · 06/02/2020 15:16

No he currently lives and pays rent in Leicester...he just stays with his parents when he is in the area

And yes he wants to support me and my kids, he wants to open a joint bank account so I have access to what I need

OP posts:

user14572856389 · 06/02/2020 15:16

he said that hes wants to provide for me and the kids so will help me wherever I need.

Why?

user14572856389 · 06/02/2020 15:17

Again, why does he want you to make yourself financially dependent on him?

ChuckleBuckles · 06/02/2020 15:18

OP you write you have been together a year, but he works away during the week so presume you only see him on weekends, do you know him well enough to move him in with your two DC? Is he going to be able to handle having two DC in his life and personal space full time, in another person's home?

Whatisthisfuckery · 06/02/2020 15:19

OP be very careful. Somebody will be paying extra for him to live there because bills will inevitably increase with an extra adult living there. You will be losing money each month and while it won’t affect your rent, because you don’t pay any, it will affect you in other areas. If you want to move him in then you need to do some very careful sums and make sure you won’t be left worse off. A household should be better off with another working adult living there, and you should be better off living with a working partner.Tred very carefully here, because if you aren’t on the ball you’ll find you lose out financially, which might be fine for you but won’t be fair on your DC.

Do fucking not take the advice of the PP who said to leave UC alone and keep claiming. If they suspect you of cohabiting while claiming as a single person you’ll be for the high jump, and it’ll all come down on your head.

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