Want partner to move in, but he refused to do a joint claim for UC

[Mummaof2roses]

So I've been a single mum for 4 years..

My partner now wants to move in (living with parents so not paying rent or bills atm)

I am currently on UC and only recieve basic for my age and my 2 kids so I said to him he can move in but I have to update my claim to joint, which is no issue for me, he earns too much money so I wont be entitled to anything from UC anyway so I read after 6 months if your wage means your not entitled your claim will be closed. All fine.

BUT he refuses to put his details forward for a joint claim he said whether we get money or not he doesn't want his details to be on the system. He said hes never claimed and never will. So he wants me to just cancel UC but I dont know how or if you can even do that?

Will they let me cancel if I say my partner wants to move in but doesnt want to be on UC?

HELP!

OP, I don't think some people have read all your thread, he seems genuine and you and your family have known him a long time. It's generous of your family to help so much, not sure they are doing you a favour in the long run by making it so cosey, but it's good that he's used to living on his own and paying bills. Its a big bonus to be able to live rent free in London. I'd say that as soon as he moves in, he ought to give you the same as you were getting from UC direct to your account, then have a joint account on top of that for food and activities. How supportive he is with domestic duties and family life, you will can only assess by finding out at the time, but it would be prudent to have a discussion on your expectations as you are now a family. You perhaps could do further training to get a higher paid job , or work more hours if he shares childcare and domestic duties fairly, so you can better yourself as you'd like.

How will you be saving up with no income?

Of course you can just close a UC claim - the government aren’t going to force you to receive benefits!

You say that, but I used to claim Carers Allowance and they wouldn't let me close my claim until I'd sent them six weeks of payslips as proof that I was earning too much to claim!

Also, for what it's worth, if I hadn't already been in "the system" on and off for many years, I'd want to avoid it

Way too soon and too fast to move in together.
Step back and stay as you are for a couple more years at least.

He will be a nightmare if you move in as a family together.

OP, I don't think some people have read all your thread, he seems genuine and you and your family have known him a long time. It's generous of your family to help so much, not sure they are doing you a favour in the long run by making it so cosey, but it's good that he's used to living on his own and paying bills. Its a big bonus to be able to live rent free in London. I'd say that as soon as he moves in, he ought to give you the same as you were getting from UC direct to your account, then have a joint account on top of that for food and activities. How supportive he is with domestic duties and family life, you will can only assess by finding out at the time, but it would be prudent to have a discussion on your expectations as you are now a family. You perhaps could do further training to get a higher paid job , or work more hours if he shares childcare and domestic duties fairly, so you can better yourself as you'd like.

Of course you can just close a UC claim - the government aren’t going to force you to receive benefits!

You say that, but I used to claim Carers Allowance and they wouldn't let me close my claim until I'd sent them six weeks of payslips as proof that I was earning too much to claim!

too, so I can see where OP's partner is coming from.

too, so I can see where OP's partner is coming from.

Sorry for double post 🤔

@Binglebong she works

It's very easy to close a UC claim, I did it just a couple of weeks ago for the same reason as yourself. I literally messaged on my UC account to inform them of the date that my partner was moving in, and told them that from that date I would no longer need their assistance. They messaged back, asked me to confirm a couple of details and on the date I'd given them I received notification that my claim had been closed. So simple.

Why can't he rent somewhere by himself, you stay with your parents and then when you find a place, move in together. The way you're planning sounds very odd

I wouldnt want someone paying for me and my children. I would want to contribute financially too. Isn't there any way you can go back to work and then save together. Relying on a man for all of my income doesnt sit well for me. Morally I dont agree with it but it also makes you and your children extremely vulnerable and reliant. If your old enough to have children you're old enough to pay for them. I understand it's not always that simple but rather than solely help you financially can your parents help with child care instead so that you can work (even if it's part time). The gift of assisting you to become financially independent (without relying solely on a man or benefits) is far greater than allowing you to live in their house bill free imo.

I got as far as Marshmallows comment. Heaven forbid you're ever associated with benefits in any way.

Revolting snobbery.

Waaaaayyyy too soon do all this moving in together. This idea that you're not a family already is the path of fools. You are already in a family! As for becoming financially dependent on someone else when you have children to support, utter folly.