Online dating red flags?

[Cherryblossom200]

Hello 😊

I would love to meet someone new, I'm 44 and a bit worried I've left it too late. But I'm given it a shot anyway. I tend to chat to guys on the phone first as I find it's a good way to tell if we can hold a conversation without having to organise childcare etc for a date which won't go anywhere .

One thing I keep coming across is men who are from divorced parents and subsequently either just haven't done the marriage thing (late 40's) or divorcees themselves. I literally come across guys with this same story ALOT. And I'm steering clear. Ideally I would like to meet someone who has got parents who are together still, and who's marriage just didn't work out. But I just don't seem to come across this very often.

I'm wondering if I'm overthinking the whole thing, I just feel like with some men I can already see the potential red flags and I don't date them

I don’t think I’ve ever asked a guy whether his parents are still together and I find that a weird issue to be fixated on. My parents are divorced and if you look at my siblings and myself you will find my older brother is divorced with children, I am married with a child, my younger brother is co-habiting with children and my younger sister is a single parent to a child ( never married ). I’ve no idea what the lesson is here.? 🤷‍♀️

Huh? What does it matter if their parents are divorced? Surely what's important is how they treat you, not the state of their parents' marriage

I think if their parents marital status matters to you, you’re going to be looking for Mr Right for a very long time

The guys I've chatted to have brought it up in conversation, strange I know. But I guess the friends I've grown up with who's parents divorced struggled with the concept of marriage and commitment in general.

I've made some colossal dating mistakes in the past, I just want to meet someone ideally from a more secure background. But then I feel if someone's parents have divorced I shouldn't rule them out.

I think that’s a ridiculous reason not to pursue something with someone. 50% of marriages end in divorce. It’s not the men’s fault their parents marriage failed.

This seems very judgemental of something that is out of your dates control.

Surely it is about the person.

Way too harsh.

I don't think you can judge someone's stability on this. I've been doing online dating and I don't think anyone has mentioned the state of their parents marriage. For what it's worth I'm separated and both me and my exes parents had long happy marriages. Honestly I don't see this issue as a red flag.

Eh?