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Is he playing games?

7 replies

shakiwulub9 · 28/01/2020 15:12

Posting on behalf of my friend who doesn't have an account but would value some additional input:

She went on a first date with a guy she likes last week. They have had on/off communication since (it was never "tennis contact" so having sporadic replies isn't out of the ordinary)

They mutually agreed they had a great time and that they would like to see each other again. However, she says she feels it's always her who is initiating contact/keeping the conversations alive. He will take hours (at a minimum!) to reply to her, sometimes even a whole 24 hours. Her intuition says that he is hot and cold, but of course (naturally) she is clinging onto hope that there is hope for something between the 2 of them. It is now almost 1 week since their first date and no concrete plans have been made for Date #2.

Note: this guy has a bit of a name for himself being a player and this has planted the seed of doubt in her head.
His last relationship ended about 9 months ago but she says he mentioned his ex a fair few times on the date, and she got the impression that he still wasn't quite over said ex.

He is 29 years old ....she recognises that it is early days, but I like to think silly little games would have stopped by now???

Thoughts?

OP posts:
bangheadhere40 · 28/01/2020 15:15

Tell her not to initiate contact!

See what he does, then she will have her answer, if he's bothered he will get in touch, if he isn't he won't.....

Whoops75 · 28/01/2020 15:15

It’s very early days but if he was interested he would be showing it.

Not looking good

Fairycake2 · 28/01/2020 15:27

As @bangheadhere40 said. Leave the contact and see what he does

dancemom · 28/01/2020 15:31

Mentioning his ex more than once on a first date??

I wouldn't be seeing him again!

CatSmize · 28/01/2020 15:36

He's not playing games, he's just not that into her!

The only way to know if a guy is really into you is to let him take the lead re messages, planning dates, etc. If he's not pushing things forward, you're wasting your time.

ThirtyAndASmidgen · 28/01/2020 19:02

I don’t think his age is relevant. I’ve found that being a player/emotionally unavailable/blowing hot and cold has no age limit.

MashedSpud · 28/01/2020 19:09

If he was interested he would have mentioned date 2 by now.

Him talking about his ex is a red flag.

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