I am sick to death of DH and his moods and horrible behaviour. I feel like I’m all over the place, even just today he has been so unpredictable one minute I’m looking at holidays for the summer, the next I’m planning my escape. I need to log it all and then somehow make sense of what it really happening, he says it is me that is moody, maybe it is but I need somewhere safe to write it all down and review it.
I don’t expect any responses, but if anyone does read this and have any advice I would love to learn your views on it all.
But of background, together 10 years, married 7, 2 dc together aged 5 and 7 and I have 2 dc from previous DH aged 11 and 13. Up and down relationship since the start.
01.01.2020 - morning, had a Very small NYE party last night, as it was me who Wanted it DH just sat and watched me clear it all up, washed dishes, hoovered, picked up party popper mess etc.
Went to walk dog and DC rode their bikes, as we left the house DD1 commented that she could see right into her bedroom as blinds were open, DH snapped and said we had to get rid of the blinds then, no one can see in, I asked him to stop and he was getting really bolshy, using a sarcastic tone of voice as he always does, he then walked on to do the walk, I was helping DD2 (5) with her bike and talking to DD1 reassuring her that it wasn’t her fault, DH is especially grumpy today. Anyway, we got further along and the DS’ stopped to play, I waited for them and DH walked on with dog, he then phoned me and was really shitty, saying what the hell are we all doing, I caught up with him and he said he was then only one walking the dog, I told him he was being ridiculous, I was helping DC, he was really nasty in the way he spoke to me.
On the way home DS1 almost knocked DD2 off of her bike, I was speaking to DS about it, DS got really upset and defensive saying it wasn’t his fault etc, DH just gave a sarcastic laugh and walked off. When we all got home I helped DC put bikes away, and said I was going to shop to get ingredients to cook a roast, I went and got in the car and DH came out, he was angry and said I couldn’t leave DS1 with him as DS hadn’t apologised to everyone for his outburst. I said DS had apologised to me and DD2 outside, DH wasn’t happy with this and said I had to take DS to the shop with me. This meant I had to stop him from playing football happily in the garden with DS2.
This all seems really pathetic now and not even worth writing down. I Just hate the way he speaks to us all, it’s his tone of voice, like we are all an annoyance.