Top tip for all of you who are experiencing major disruptions to the home dynamic after baby arrives......
Our first arrived in November, and by Xmas I/we were seriously wondering if we were going to make it. The arguments and distaste for each other made for a hellish home environment.
Then I stumbled upon a book "Babyproof Your Marriage" (Cockrell/O'Neill/Stone). After I read it, things were unbelievably better. After husband read half of it, things were back to normal (i.e., brilliant, fantastic, wonderful).
I can't recommend this book highly enough - it really helped us to adjust to parenthood and to understand each other's changed perspectives.
Good luck, and don't give up!