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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Why are they behaving like this?

1 reply

Claire926 · 08/12/2019 11:27

I am on dating app Bumble and have been speaking to a few guys. Yesterday was my birthday. I went out and celebrated on Friday night and one guy said he hadn't heard from me on Friday and then messaged me again wishing me happy birthday. Another one messaged me and then messaged again as I had not replied saying happy birthday and asked how my birthday was. Why do these men think I am going to go on a dating app on my birthday? I just feel these men have no hobbies or lives. I always reply within 24 hours as I am busy but it seems this is not enough for them and they want a reply sooner.

The third one who angered me the most was someone I stupidly gave my phone number. We have never met and he wished me happy birthday. Later in the day he tries to ring me and I text him saying I am out celebrating which I already told him this the day before. He then said 'pfft priorities', I ignored the message and he messaged later on saying 'what we doing tonight', I ignored that message too. This one is the worst of them all, why he is attention seeking on my birthday? He seems to be with his phone a lot and doesn't go out or have hobbies. I find he seems controlling and a time waster and wants my attention, even on my birthday.

Should I just delete the apps? When I met men in real life they were busy focusing on their lives and respected my time vice versa not bombarding with messages all the time.

OP posts:
bigchris · 08/12/2019 11:41

The trouble with modern day dating is the only way to get a connection is to text and text and text

So if you go the online route that is what you have to spend time doing

Best thing to do is meet in real life asap to cut out the incessant messaging In case you spend weeks messaging someone you don't click with in person

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