Scammed on a dating site

[PermanentTemporary]

Just wondered if anyone else had experienced this. I'm assuming most people are savvy enough not to actually send money - I was an idiot. But wondered if it had been tried out with you.

It happened on a site I wont name except to say that it rhymes with Bardian OldMates

It was funny, because as soon as he thought I was transferring money to him, all the niceties were dropped and he became full on about it. He kept messaging me asking when I was transferring the money. They have no shame these people. And it's innocent women they prey on. You do get the Russian beauties preying on vulnerable men though.
They must have collectively decided that all women are suckers for a man in uniform, a widow, with children to look after, stuck in a warzone or similar.

Oh, and like another poster, we had moved to Whatsapp to chat and when I tried to report him/it/them/she to the website, the profile was gone.

I just joined an online dating app last week. Have been single for 10 years. I'm 58 and look a lot younger (I put that down to being single for so long). Anyway I wanted to see what I was missing but checked out on Mumsnet and other places about staying safe beforehand. Got loads of messages within the first couple of hours. I replied to one of the very few that looked eligible and who profile sounded ok too. He was a widow and a doctor. His name was John Tsang. After a couple of messages back and forth he suggested if I had WhatsApp I should give him my phone number and we could chat there . I blocked him straight away. Think I had a lucky escape. Also, I reckon looking at what's on offer I way better off by myself.

It's not just on internet dating, either. I had a scammer contact me via Meetup (reverse google search on the picture revealed it to be of someone totally different), friends have also been contacted via singles groups on Facebook. Fortunately, none of us have been taken in but the scammers wouldn't be doing it if it didn't work.
Well done for posting OP, this thread may just save someone else.

I'm 58 and look a lot younger (I put that down to being single for so long)

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Not a dating scam, but I was on holiday recently and I got a text through from TV Licences saying to follow the link to re-put in bank details as they had changed and were not going through. I remember I was so incensed with TV Licences contacting me by text, I was furious actually, and it was such a snippy text as well. I thought when I get home I'm going to give them a piece of my mind and where did BBC TV Licences they get my number, anyway? I know they can use underhand tactics so this is where my anger was going...

Anyway after a couple of days it crossed my mind was this a genuine text. It seemed like it, it was certainly as rude as BBC TV Licenses! It had a link to re-send my bank account details, a link admittedly I didn't open.

I looked online and its a massive scam apparently. I am usually very wary but was almost taken it, phew.

Scammers are everywhere.

Also, I watched that drama recently about being scammed "Cold Calls", a bit far fetched in some ways esp at the end, but some good actors.

This happened to a co-worker of mine. I first heard of him when she asked me to switch shifts so she could spend Valentines' Day with him. Of course, at the last minute he couldn't make it.

She sent him money when he lost his phone, then he was put in jail because the people who had hired him (he was a developer and worked all over the world), didn't like the work he had done and needed bail. He was her soulmate, even right down to having the same health problems.

I don't know how much she lost in the end, but she told me she had cut him off, but still thought he was her soulmate.

@goneanddoneitagain did he just ask to talk on WhatsApp? That's standard for dating apps and is how you talk to someone once you've had a few conversations over the app. Have I missed something?

@Notcoolmum my son said that moving to WhatsApp was normal also. He's 20 Not likely to get scammed as he has no assets . However, I wouldn't call the messages that we exchanged as conversations. After the inital message where he told me about himself. His messages were "are you ready for a serious relationship now" and "I understand. I don't come on here often so if you have WhatsApp we can talk there." I don't see the difference in answering a message on POF to WhatsApp, unless you are hiding something. Also, I would never give my number to someone I hadn't actually met first and decided they were ok. To me he was still a complete stranger. Maybe I'm just paranoid. Anyway, I've deleted the app now. I'll try meeting someone real life instead.

Maybe you should have someone in real life that you trust to talk to about any messages you send online so this doesn't happen again. Or at least to talk things through before you do something like this again.

It won't always be the same scam, and that particular scam is an old one and not one of the better ones. There are some that sound absolutely genuine. I work in security and had something come through to analyse that sounded completely genuine, looked genuine and yet a voice in my head was going 'that is complete bullshit'. So I looked into it deeper and yep a scam. But most would fall for it.