We have had a lot of ups and downs over the years lots of them, kids grown up and still living at home daughter wants to get us marriage counselling for Christmas!! I have a big birthday coming up and my husband doesn’t seem bothered about helping organise anything so my friend is taking me away for a night a weekend after my birthday and when I told him he went off on one saying I never want to do anything with him. He is hardly ever nice time but tries to make it out I cause all the problems, I am not perfect but he would rather I just sat in until he was ready to say he wanted to do something it is like he does not want me to have a life?? Why are men like this .