Did you have a baby at 40 or over?

[TigerBreadCake]

If so, how easy was it? Conceiving, pregnancy and birth?

I’m a bit scared of being an older mum but really want my own kids

Yes, but that was #4

Have you thought about going for a fertility MOT, so that you know your numbers?

Yes...had DS a month before my 42nd birthday...conception and pregnancy were trouble free. I had some issues post birth but none of it was age related.

I had #4 when I was 44. I was physically fine however had an issue with the placenta so was closely monitored. He was absolutely fine. A friend of mine had her first baby a few months ago and she was 46. Baby is gorgeous but he did arrive 5 weeks early.

Yes - met DH at 39, had child at 40. Conception and pregnancy were really easy, right up to the point where DS was born 11 weeks premature, nearly didn't survive, and now has a plethora of disabilities. And I wouldn't go back and change anything, we still love him to pieces and don't regret a single moment

A fertility MOT...sounds very scary. What would they say? You can or can’t? Or do they give a percentage?

My sister had her two children after 40 - after multiple miscarriages each time. She found it very easy to get pregnant, but difficult to carry beyond 14 weeks - there's 5 years between them.

Her first was 10 weeks premature and had really bad reflux and allergies up to about 18 months. Her second was a trouble-free pregnancy and birth.

They’ll run blood tests and scan your ovaries and tell you what your hormone levels and ovarian reserve numbers are like. All properly explained and contextualised.

chrisrmas was age was she with the second? Xx

Yes, I had my DS just before my 41st birthday.
Conception was relatively easy (but I did have a miscarriage first), pregnancy was no bother at all, birth was difficult - he was late and would not come out!
Motherhood....I love it (but I'd love to have more energy too)!

How old are you OP?

Tottie but what’s the outcome? Is it a simple yes or no you can have a baby?

More an idea of your chances.

I think I’d be scared to check

Fell pregnant at 40.5, fourth time trying around the right time (well I thought a bit too early, was using ovulation tests). Luckily no problems during pregnancy. Chose to have ceasarian.

Darling do you mean it took you four months?

If you track your ovulation with tests or the Ava bracelet (expensive) or the other monitor (tampon type thing I don't like the sound of),it should give you an idea if you're ovulating regularly and when. You could get basic hormone tests etc via gp. They will ask if you've TTC for at least 6 months though and will start with your partner.

I had my second child at 41..conception easy..infact so easy we didnt know we were trying to get pregnant!!! I had an elective C section and was up and doing 4 days later.Recovery took a while maybe 6 months or so before I actually felt myself.I had my first child at 19 though so it was a bit of a surprise! I am 48 now and all is as it should be.Kids and menopause somedays its quite challenging in our house!!!!

Darling do you mean it took you four months?

No; due to my do working away the four times were over 6 months. But we only had sex once , around the right time, four times. I'm aware that was fast/lucky.

I had my fourth at 41. Conceived first time of trying in a moment of madness. Was utterly knackered all pregnancy. Had a home birth which was really nice and bounced back pretty quickly.

DC4 is bright and beautiful and an absolute joy.

No but know some who have, generally by accident, and all worked out very well. It depends on the individual's health and general outlook.

TigerBread, if you are thinking of trying for a baby it won't hurt to have a few tests, at least you'll now how likely you are to succeed. I would think most people of 40 are still fairly fertile, there's no reason to fear you wouldn't be. More important is how you would cope, are you a 'young' 40, are you reasonably fit!

We have to remember many younger people aren't particular fit and well and some are old before their time. Problems can crop up at any age.

My parents were over 40 when I appeared on the scene, they'd been married 18-19 years and always wanted a baby. I have to say they were extremely old for their ages, very set in their ways and insular in outlook - didn't mix with people outside of the family, my mum had never even been to work since she married! I hated my childhood, couldn't wait to be old enough to get away and spread my wings, so I would definitely not have left it so late to have a child.

Everyone is different. I'm sure you and your partner are nothing like my parents (who were good in some ways). Good luck to you.

2nd at 41, one MC before quick conception, just over two hour labour.

how do these posts sit with this:

"A 30-year-old woman has a 20 percent chance of getting pregnant in any given month. At 40, that figure plummets to 5 percent. By the time you reach 45, your chance of a healthy pregnancy using your own eggs is 1 percent."

from a general internet search

Because percentage risk/chance per month is not the same as odds/probability.

Risk/chance over 6 months or one year is what gets you pregnant. Unless you are lucky in which case it could be earlier.

NHS fertility page says that 90% of women under 40 fall pregnant within two years of trying.

Over 40 I don't know offhand what figures are.

Colliquially, being Ireland/NI lots of women here used to have kids in early 40s (and sometimes beyond) until the church/contraception grip loosened.

I had my first at 40 and 2nd at 45. Both naturally conceived and no problems at all with these 2; happy, healthy children. On the downside, I had 3 miscarriages in between babies.
Love being a Mum and think there are definitely advantages to being older.