Me my life, everything broken

[timetostartagain]

I've tried to post a couple times today but it's been hard trying to write everything down and it's so long and messy

But I'm on my own, I don't know where to begin or what to do.
The short story is after a very up and down couple months my partner was arrested last night for destroying my house and I mean destroyed.
He's been released, packed some bags and gone I'm left to pick up the pieces.
I'm broken and my stuff is broken

Are you safe? Have you got a friend you could ask to come round?

I'm safe. He's left and isn't coming back, I want to phone my dad and tell him but I don't want him to see me in this mess

Do you have friends or family who can support you at the moment? You must be in an awful state of shock. Just offering you a virtual handhold.

Phone your dad lass, please just pick up the phone and call him. People here will be happy to support you and have a lot of knowledge, but please do just call your dad. If you were my daughter, I'd want you to call.

OMG you are having such a tough time. Reach out for kind words as much as you need. I have been in the same position and although it is like crawling over broken glass the only way is up. Better it happened now than years on when its even harder. Just try to breathe in and out. Will be thinking of you ..xxxx and big hugs.

I just don't know where to begin. Thank you everybody for commenting and supporting.
This is so so hard

If you were my child or sibling I'd want you to ring me right now. Please phone your dad.

Start by making yourself a nice cup of tea with two spoonfuls of sugar in it. Try to force down some toast, or even just some bread and butter because I bet you haven't eaten anything yet.

Then pick up your phone and press the 'dad' button and let him come and look after you. You can do it, we are all behind you.

Call. He'd want you to. You need some support

No I haven't eaten. I've been ill all week with a horrific cold and cough. I will make that call to my dad. I really appreciate the support I really do.

Agreed, please call you dad. So sorry OP.

I've called him, he's coming over later when he finishes work

Please make that call. Take your time, eat little and often and over everything be kind to yourself. You've had a shock but you'll be ok.

I am glad you are safe, and am glad you have called your dad. Deep breaths, its just stuff, it can be replaced....you cant.

Be kind to yourself and let people help if they can.

Good luck

Ah good. Your dad is coming. Let him be in charge for a little while, while you are in shock.

Post here as often as you like. You'll get so much support

Thank you so much again everybody, I'm in shock I can't believe how things can change so so quickly. But the warnings were there I just chose to ignore and hope for the best

And, as a pp says - it's just stuff. You are alive, that's what matters the most.

You are all correct it is just stuff and can easily be replaced or glued back together.
It's just the horrible brutal way it happened, I guess you never really know someone

Take photos of all the damage before you clean up (or get your dad to) as evidence.

You don't timetostartagain. You don't.
You can replace things. Make sure that you look after yourself and let your dad and friends help you.
Hug.

Already have the photos as do the police, one room down 4 more to do.

Ahhh bless you.
What a horrible guy,your well rid.
And things are can be replaced YOU CAN`T BE.
Sending you a v big hug.

So sorry this has happened but glad you have some support on the way.

Please don't ever feel needy or foolish for being taken in. Abusers are very good at hiding their abusive ways, until they aren't.

Have a good think with your dad (and or any other supportive people) about how you can keep yourself safe and this arsehole out of your life.

This happened to me some years ago. As you clean up you'll probably notice how selectively trashed it is. I remember picking up shattered mementos, irreplaceable photos torn, treasured books ripped apart and sobbing for all my things as I did it. All my stuff ruined, barely anything of his got touched in his rampage. Then I came to his laptop -his pride and joy- seemingly thrown but it apparently landed on a cushion with another cushion on top of it. Not a scratch.

Since the fucker was still sleeping off his exertions, I took it outside wrapped up in a blanket and dropped it many times from above my head onto concrete and maybe some would say it wasn't my finest moment but it certainly was therapeutic taking my frustration and hurt out on it. I made sure that I didn't leave a scratch on it either and left it exactly where I found it. It apparently never worked again

It hurts a lot, but you will get through this. My family rallied around and you know what surprised me? They already had an inkling and were just waiting for the day I'd reach out for help. Yours likely will too.

I'm safe now he's left and I know he won't come back. There is one slight complication though, we met through work and work in the same department but he is requesting an immediate move.
Work are aware of the situation as well.
It's all just one big fucked up mess, literally