New partner and my child

[Yodasdog]

I need some help to put things into perspective as I think sometimes it can be difficult when you are in the middle of things.

I have a 3 year old (lives with me 5 days a week) and a new partner of about 10 months. I’m starting to feel that there’s some jealousy creeping in from my partner when I am with my child. My partner has said she feels neglected and feels left out when my child and I are cuddled up together. She has said that she feels my attention should be split 50/50 between them, I pointed out that my child is young and needs me and her response was to then agree that my child should come first and to say that she see’s that my child needs more than 50% and should be my priority. But I feel that there’s an undercurrent of that jealousy there.
We have talked about a future and the possibility of having children of our own in a few years but this is really concerning me.

Thanks all, you’ve been really helpful. Sometimes it’s really beneficial to hear people echo what you’ve been thinking.
It’s sad really, she could have had something really good here with us, I think we are a nice little family with lots to offer but my boy is more than enough for me, I don’t need anyone else so will not be tolerating this any longer.

Well done 💐

It's hard but then again it isn't - as you say, your boy is everything 😊

She sounds immature and I’d finish it before she starts treating your child differently

Your child should come first 100% all of the time and anyone who expects different is not worth your time

Respect OP

Respect from me too op. It's not easy.

Little story, my ds (then 5) once announced to my dp that I (mum) loved him (ds) more than I love dp.

Dp replied "Ds you are absolutely right, mummy loves you more than she loves me. It will always be that way, I could only love mummy if I knew she loved you best".

That's the way it should always be imo. There are good folk out there but you've unfortunately got to bin the shit ones as soon as they reveal themselves. It sucks.

My exes sister was like this with every bloke she dated with children - was desperate to be the 'queen' and for him to 'forget' his past and make her the centre of the universe. I have a relative like this. Shes in her 60s now, has kids of her own, and yet this is her attitude. Its foul tbh.

I mean I would take it as a red flag but I know it's far from that easy a lot of the time but I think what she said is totally wrong anyone new who came into my life I would be straight up and say like my child gets first dips basically they will always come first too be honest I'd hope whoever I was saying it too wouldn't expect less

Suggest you just see each other when you don't have DS.
Please don't tell me she lives with you.
Failing that dump the jealous stupid woman

I posted something similar about a month ago, OP. My bf of 5 months met my 4 year old son for the first time - we went out for a pizza lunch. Imo the lunch was a success! My little boy thought bf was funny and I was so pleased how it went. Then bf went really quiet and eventually I extracted this comment: 'your son seems very affectionate towards you, hard to find a space for me I think'. I couldn't believe my ears! He said he wasnt going to lie but seeing my son cuddling me etc was hard for him to watch. The bf is no more!

My 2yo gets jealous when me and his dad cuddle on the sofa and will ALWAYS manage to squeeze himself between us.
It's totally normal and me and DH just laugh.
No way would I risk my sons feelings or security for anyone else.
Get rid OP.