Why aren't I good enough?

[sosickoflove]

I started dating her in may,this was my first gay relationship.
Anyway we were going on dates and I thought it was going somewhere,we text daily lots of contact.
Got on well and she told me she wasn't sleeping with anyone else.
Then she said she just wanted us to be friends,it was getting too much into relationship territory.
Here's the thing last week she asked me for a drink.
I met her and within 30 mins she asked me for a kiss and we slept together.
The morning she told me she had slept with another woman the night before,she slept with a waitress the weekend before and also her friend wants a relationship with her but she doesn't but Is sleeping with her.
She told me I'm going to end up hurt and girls have tried and failed to change her.
She told me she was bad news.
She went home and once again non stopped text all week.
She was out last night and this morning she was texting me as usual
She then sent me a screenshot of a convo between her and her friends basically saying she had sex with a random woman again last night.
She said "I've been at it again ha ha ha "
I'm so hurt and I know it's my own fault
How awful to rub it in my face.
I told her last week I had feelings for her.
Why aren't I good enough to be with ?

It’s Her whose not good enough for you!!!

Who says you're not good enough. She's clearly not interested in committing to one person and has a rather clumsy way of communicating that to you.
If you want an exclusive relationship then cut her loose, forget about it and move on to meet other people.

You will meet someone who wants the same thing as you.

She's not a very nice woman, and she's definitely not the right woman for you. Stop dating her, stop sleeping with her. Find a partner who wants to be with you and only you, and not someone promiscuous like this woman. At least she's telling you she's playing the field and not deceiving you into thinking you're exclusive.

Umm, news flash - she's a bitch.

Come on now, you aren't 15 anymore. You know it isn't your fault that this shit human doesn't like you enough to commit.

When someone tells you they are an asshole (and also in her case acts like one) believe them.

Stop seeing her, she has issues. And it sounds like you have poor self esteem you need to work on. Someone like her around isn't helping that.

What hurts is last week she was lying in bed with me and stupid me telling her how much I liked her.
Then sleeps with some random.
After telling me let's just be friends but then kisses me and texts me all the time.
It's one thing to say that she is sleeping with others but why the hell show me screenshots.
It's just awful feeling so worthless

She sounds really nasty OP.

@Pinkbonbon it's crazy tho because at first she seemed to want more then she said it was too full on and she didn't want a relationship
Now she's rubbing it in my face who she's sleeping with.

My friend today said
She would have sex with a letterbox if it had a flap...and I believe it
Last weekend we had kissed and there was a girl and she wanted her attention even tho I was there.
It didn't matter who she was.

She's not good enough for you. I would text something like "You're right, I can't change you and I'm going to get hurt if I keep seeing you. Take care, see you around." Then I would delete her number. It's one thing not wanting a relationship but she's not showing you any respect. I half suspect she's doing this because she thinks she's got you hooked. You deserve better.

She sounds horrible. It’s not about you at all, she’s just being really fucked up (id put money on this being her usual way of behaving too). Don’t put up with this rubbish - find someone who treats you well.

@LFLM1 she actually said about 2 other girls
"I could take advantage and they would come running"
She obviously knows I would too.
She was saying are you jealous ?
Your a jealous person aren't you
I think she likes it ..likes making girls jealous.
I didn't react at all.

I wouldn't engage with her any longer. Don't respond to her texts. Don't go out with her again. You're setting yourself up for heartache if you do. She's already told you she doesn't want a relationship with you. Find someone emotionally available, this woman is only going to hurt you.

She actually told me a girl who she was dating casually a couple of years ago text her asking what she was up too...and she sent her a pic in bed with another woman.
Stupidly I thought I could change her.

Chick sounds like she has a cluster b personality disorder. A entitled little narcissist. Sometimes they just gave this magnetism about them.

But she's actually an empty little scrubber op. I'd text her to feck off and block her on everything.

Last week her son wanted concert tickets and she was at work,I stood outside the arena for two hours to get her them for him for Xmas.
We get on so well,she has told me so many stories of her ex's treating her badly/being controlling and violent towards her.
I wouldn't do a thing to hurt her.

Umm wake-up. She's the controlling one. And she's taking you for a right ride.

Don't be a doormat, OP. She should have been the one to stand outside the arena for 2 hours to get her son concert tickets. You might not do anything to hurt her but she is hurting you - respect yourself more, you deserve better than this.

She's been completely honest with you, she sleeps with multiple partners and is not looking for a relationship. Why are you still trying?

She sounds unhinged , or like a teenager . How old is she?
Block and move on. Next time she texts literally just tell her to fuck off and cut all contact.

Please, do not believe this is you. It's HER. She sounds like a mess, and an insecure attention seeker. Cut contact with her, most women will not treat you in this manner.

When she backed off and said let's be friends I said ok.
Then after sleeping with her last week I stupidly thought she might have changed her mind.
As she kissed me and we had a great morning just hanging out and breakfast in bed.
It felt nice.
Yet 6 days later she's out having sex with a girl she doesn't even know the name of.

She is 38.
I think I'm just seeing her real character now.
At first I was all goey eyed thinking I meant something to her...reality is I'm just another woman.
Good enough to sleep with but not be with properly.
She's made me start not liking myself.

You need to work on your self esteem. You're worth more than this and you know it. She has told you who she is, believe her.

I can't even get mad either because she's told me what she does and has said girls have tried to change her and they can't.
It's a lost cause.
I thought she had feelings for me and just wanted to start something with me.
I was wrong

It’s nothing you’re doing wrong or anything personal to you as she is blatantly doing it to many others so just cut her off entirely. She’s just a dickhead and she will end up old and lonely one day because of it.