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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Husband has list of improvements for me in the bedroom...

63 replies

Debbierocket123 · 12/09/2019 15:22

We were having a conversation the other day about how one of our mutual friends had cheated on his wife and I jokingly said to my husband that if he had any complaints (in the bedroom) he should let me know and he responded with "I have a list of things!". He said he was joking at the time but I haven't stopped thinking about it since. He says he's happy with me but I get the feeling he isn't... any advice would be appreciated.

OP posts:
Bapman · 12/09/2019 20:23

@SpamChaudFroid brilliantGrin

Nicolastuffedone · 12/09/2019 20:24

Do a dance?? I laughed my head off at that!!!!

OmniversalsTapdancingTadpole · 12/09/2019 20:27

How about he does a dance for you? Proper full on sexy time dance like Jim in american pie.

In the spirit of sharing is caring y'know Grin

Tooner · 12/09/2019 20:29

@Boots20 Oh I don't know, both of them would make your boobs jiggle🤣

The fandango would be a good choice😄

Lollypop701 · 12/09/2019 20:33

Personally I’d tell him to do the windmill dance for me

letsdolunch321 · 12/09/2019 20:50

Cheeky fucker ..... tell him to sort his dysfunctional dick out himself.

Pinkarsedfly · 12/09/2019 20:54

You could do the full-on Thriller dance?

Jabbercocky · 12/09/2019 21:02

Maybe you should use it as an opportunity to improve your sex life. Open up the conversation that so many couples fail to do. Take his list. Give him yours.

LTR’s can easily go staid and a lot of grief can be avoided if we got over ourselves and had the conversations we most fear to have.

Don’t preach the mantra that communication is key in a relationship if you turn down this invitation to communicate.

timshelthechoice · 12/09/2019 21:29

Why not find a YouTube clip of a tribal dance for limp cocks and show him that?

ChuckleBuckles · 13/09/2019 10:21

@Jabbercocky LTR going staid? This guy was Op's partner in August and now is OP's husband, how has the bounce gone from his bungee already? They were not even living together at the start of this month.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3684606-Why-am-I-feeling-confused

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/housekeeping/3681959-Can-I-ask-him-to-do-housework

Jabbercocky · 13/09/2019 10:38

She does not mention the length of the relationship in her OP. Why would I cross reference across two other threads?

Just looking at one of those threads she complains about him not knowing her favourite colour! What is she? Five?

Sorry OP, you have a weird criteria for judging if someone cares about you.

Singlenotsingle · 13/09/2019 16:49

Never mind chuckles it makes a good story

Nicolastuffedone · 14/09/2019 08:59

Baby shark. But use your real teeth, that’ll help him focus

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