Almost Affair

[SevilleorBust]

Asking for opinions.

Married 18 years. I would have said happily, inasmuch as no unhappiness brought to your attention.

Two children, 13 and 11 ( 11 year old just starting secondary).

I found incriminating text messages to a work colleague. Once confronted, DH confessed that if that work colleague had said yes, he would have cheated. (She turned him down).

What would you do?

OP - you say until this discovery you had what you thought was a happy marriage. So - your day/day lives and interactions must have been ok and friendly, and loving?
All that has chanced is now you know something could have happened but didn’t.

You are in a long marriage. And it clearly evolved into more of a union based on stability and joint home/children.
(I say that because he nearly cheated and easily admitted it. You don’t seem to be bothered by it, and more worried about financial security)
So - based on that - if both of you wanted to continue to live as you did before the revelation - you should be able to.
Would you care if he had/was having an affair, as long as you stay together as a family until kids leave home? If financial security for the kids is the main concern - maybe you two can work something out?