His secret is out...

[mordecaithomas]

23 weeks pregnant and I've been no contact with the father for over a month.

I posted a thread a while ago, not sure if anyone would remember. He lied to everyone, told his family there was no chance it could be his and asked me to "take the dna from another man" when they ask for proof after birth (which they want). He's been horrendous throughout the whole pregnancy. Then I found out he had a new girlfriend and he told me she had no idea and he didn't intend on telling her. From that point I'd had enough and decided to go no contact and haven't heard from him for over a month.

Last night, I got a message request from his girlfriend. She'd found my Instagram and seen my photos and asked me how I knew him and if the baby was his.

I had to tell her the truth. I feel absolutely awful.

She's only 20 years old and she now thinks her world has blown apart and I feel absolutely horrendous. She's the same age as my youngest sister and I feel so fucking terrible for her.

I don't even know why I'm posting this... I've just woken up from the worst nights sleep after speaking to this poor girl for a couple of hours last night. Terrible dreams about the baby's father.

Eurgh.

You did get a favour telling her the truth!

You've done nothing wrong at all but her disgrace of a father has. You've told the girl the truth now block her, keep nc with your ex and concentrate on the rest of your pregnancy.

*her

Just found the link to my previous thread ☹️

...to want to lose my shit at the situation? http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/amiibeingunreasonable/3639352-to-want-to-lose-my-shit-at-the-situation

Father of your baby I meant lol

You've done her a favour OP, something was obviously wrong for her to go looking for you on social media. I'm sorry that this prick is making everything so stressful for you

You have nothing to be sorry for. He should have told her the truth

I just feel sick.

Some of the stuff she told me about him just made the whole situation worse. The length of his lies. How much he'd lied to her, not even just about the baby.

Turns out they'd only been together since end of June, which was when I last saw him. In that time, he's been what I would call emotionally abusive.

Only the night before, he'd made her block male friends out of jealousy. She sent me screenshots of what he'd said and his behaviour made me sick. He's an even bigger nasty piece of work than I ever imagined and I felt for her so much.

Er, the truth didn’t hurt her the lies did. You did her a favour by being honest, her spidey senses are working just fine. Why are you losing sleep over this? You did nothing wrong.

Sounds like you’ve done her a favour, I’d waste no more time feeling bad. I hope she leaves him.

@AgentJohnson I struggle with sleep when I'm under stress. I have horrid nightmares and that's when the stress comes to the surface.

I think it's because I felt so horrible about the situation for her.

Does he yet know you told her?

You did the right thing, but she can just walk away from him. You may not find it quite so easy because of the child

I have no idea. Last thing she said to me was he still hadn't replied to her messages.

I think I'm dreading what happens when he does find out.

Trying to work out the timeline, but has the 20 y/o been with him for a few weeks or months? You were right to tell her, but honestly not worth another thought. Her world hasn't fallen apart, she'll get over it fine.

She said last night they first met up end of June and "officially" started being together on 8th July.

Not a long time at all, but she's 20 and by the sounds of it fully invested in him. Saying she was in love with him and he said it back etc etc.

A bit much for a month imo but that's just me. At the end of the day she's still hurt.

If she has half a brain, she would end it with him.

She's only 20 years old and she now thinks her world has blown apart and I feel absolutely horrendous. She's the same age as my youngest sister and I feel so fucking terrible for her

You did her a favour, besides they've been together 5 minutes she'll get over it. Concentrate on you!

I hope she does and doesn't take him back, but that's nothing to do with me what choice she makes. From what she's said though, I'd be concerned if she did.

It seems as though he's got a habit of purposely dating girls who live far away. She's not local to him either. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Op, why involve yourself further? You have given the gf what she asked about and it’s her decision what to do with her relationship. Safeguard your baby and yourself.

Fuck. She's just messaged me again. He's replying. So far he's denied even knowing me.

I think it would be best for you to step away from her messages now. You need to concentrate on yourself.

Disengage from the situation and concentrate on you and your baby. You’ve given her all the info that you can. It’s up to her if she believes you or him.

You really need to block this woman, and move on with your life. You have no need for all this drama!

You're right, I can't deal with this.

I sent her everything I had, all the messages. He's gonna lie and nothing I say will change it.

Thank god I blocked him on everything last month.

I'm out.

Well done. Hopefully the other lady has the same sense as you