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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Emotional abuse or am I too sensitive?

51 replies

LCScotmum · 08/08/2019 14:51

Hi everyone. I know this has probably been asked countless times before but I feel I need to ask someone who doesnt know me personally. I l have been in a relationship since I was 15 I'm now 29, we have been married 5 years and have 7 and 2 year old daughters together. Basically since the beginning he has always been grumpy. Over the years though it's got worse and worse. I have had some sort of epiphany and now think I may have been mistreated. It's been over the course of 13 years so little things have built up. I'm going to bullet point some examples as there has been so many things..

  • he questions why I put makeup on etc and is confidence I do it for someone else
    Has said I put makeup on as I'm a sheep aka a follower.

  • has made personal joking comments infront of his friends then apologised and then continues to do again on other nights out.

  • he has said on more occasions than I can remember that he is 10 times smarter than me and for me to remember that

  • he times how long it takes me to drive places such as from work and to pop to shop for simple things like milk. If I get stuck in traffic I'll get questioned what I was doing when i get home.

*Years ago i got s keychain as a gift and I was home from a night out 10 mins later than expected and he smashed it to pieces infront of me.

  • for my birthday (pre kids) my mum took me away for a weekend and he wouldnt speak and said I was so selfish not including him. I bought him a jacket as a gift and all he done was moan at me spending money.

  • if I have a night out with friends i can guarantee an argument will be had before it and then he wont speak to me all the next day and. Infact last time he didnt speak until 5pm and had kept our oldest up till 3am playing playstation, he said it was because she was having fun but part of me thinks he done it to annoy me.

*he would get blind drunk to the point of being sick and shitting himself for me to have to clean him up and take him home. The next day he would moan and say I'm boring for not getting drunk etc.

  • he will question me on everything, even insignificant issues such as why a pan has been put in the wrong drawer.

I know that was long but that's afew examples I can think about just now. Basically I feel like I have been walking on egg shells for a large part of my life and my mood always depended on what mood he was in. He has said on afew occasions that it doesnt matter what I do he just wont ever be 100% happy. Now over the past 2 years I've felt like I no longer love him but stuck through it for the kids. I've now reached a point I'm so miserable and cannot stop thinking about things that hes done. I've spoke to my mum which was a major hurdle and friends also who are of the opinion that I have been mistreated.

I told my husband last week that I no longer love him and want to move out after xmas. He had a breakdown and said he has treated me horribly for basically half my life and has been nothing but nice since. He did say though that if he starts speaking to me horribly again I have to "remind him" to be nice.

This has dragged on for more than I wanted it to but basically I'd like your opinions on if you think this behaviour is just generally moodiness or if its wrong.

Thanks to anyone that takes the time to read this xx

OP posts:
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 08/08/2019 14:59

Why the hell are you waiting until Christmas? Pack your stuff and leave this abusive, controlling arsehole NOW before he turns nasty.

Do not tell him you're going until you're out and safe. Do you have friends/family you can stay with?

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 08/08/2019 15:00

Do not let your daughters grow up thinking this is what a healthy and normal relationship looks like. It is NOT healthy or normal. And sounds pretty miserable too.

ThatCurlyGirl · 08/08/2019 15:01

IMO yes he is very abusive.

You don't need that label in order to address the fact you're incredibly unhappy and being bullied.

Nobody says you have to prove abuse to leave my love, please get out he's making you sad, scared and confused.

You deserve more, anyone does Thanks

LCScotmum · 08/08/2019 15:02

I'm not on the best wage and he is being reasonable for now. I want to put myself in the best financial situation I can as I have afew small debts to pay. You've made me cry reading that, tears of relief as I have been going round in roundabouts in my head wondering if this is right or not

If I didnt have the kids I would go to my mums in a minute but I want to try limit the drama for their sake. I sort of view it as I've felt this way for so long, another 4 ish months is nothing x

OP posts:
LCScotmum · 08/08/2019 15:03

Thank you. Yes I am miserable and tbh if he was the nicest guy in the planet I would still be leaving as I just dont love him anymore. I just wanted an opinion of an outsider as my friends have been saying it for so long x

OP posts:
goingdeepinthesky · 08/08/2019 15:04

Yes that is a terrible and abusive relationship. I can't believe you clean up his faeces and he calls you boring.

He's a pathetic and weak little man who tries to make himself feel big by making you feel small. Of course he is being nice now. He doesn't want his kicked puppy to leave - he wants to be able to kick you again in the future.

You are brilliant and strong for seeing through him and intending to leave. My advice is to go as soon as you can.

LL83 · 08/08/2019 15:07

Read back your post, imagine it's your friend or sister writing it and what would you tell her?

It is not ok. Leave asap. Whatever the consequences are they cannot be as bad as staying.

1WayOrAnother · 08/08/2019 15:08

Yes, he's is abusive. Thank goodness you've spotted it while you're still relatively young. You've loads of time ahead of you to be happy, get support, get a plan & get out. You won't regret it. You deserve better and so do your children. Good luck OP

category12 · 08/08/2019 15:09

I'd look at getting out sooner if you can. Could your Mum help you pay off the debts, and you pay her back over a longer period?

Speak to Women's Aid about what's been going on at home.

Singlenotsingle · 08/08/2019 15:14

There's definitely something wrong with him. He's abusive and controlling and he's lucky he's been able to get away with it for so long. I left one H because he pushed me; another one because he was emotionally stunted. Nothing compared with what you've had to put up with. Just LTB, the sooner the better.

LCScotmum · 08/08/2019 15:15

If it with a friend of family member I would be saying exactly what they are saying to me. I am 100% leaving but will wait till after xmas for the kids etc also as I'm going to be starting from scratch and will have nothing. Hence me waiting to save abit of money and pay off some small debts. Not really in a position to ask parents for help financially but I know when I go they will be supportive.

Thank you so much for confirming it for me, I knew at times I hadn't been treated right but the brain is a funny thing I suppose and I always tried to see it as a one off

OP posts:
lolaflores · 08/08/2019 15:22

Have any of your friends commented on this?
Is there anyway to rearrange the debts, reduce the amount you repay?
You have been ground down by the relentless shite Nd it has o doubt increased over time and will continue to do so.
Stay strong. Stay in contact on here because there will be tough times when he will still try to get in your head. You are right. You deserve better and tiu are going to reclaim your life.
Xmas may come and go and there will be another reason not to go.
Do it before the kids go back to school.

PickAChew · 08/08/2019 15:26

I'd make sure you have important documents copied and put of the house well before Christmas because he doesn't sound the type of man to stay on his best behaviour for that long.

LCScotmum · 08/08/2019 15:30

Yeah that's it exactly ground down by day to day things over the years. I will def stay in contact! Thank you for taking time to read my post. Xmas will come but I will definitely be going. I calculated leaving before xmas and its just not doable. January is a def 100%. I have came and gone with the idea of leaving over the years but I know for definate I will be going.

OP posts:
LCScotmum · 08/08/2019 15:31

Yes I have done already, keep them in my work locker. I have paid of things myself such as the kids bed and the sofa so they will be going with me. He will be heartbroken to begin with but after the dust settles I'm sure the true him will come out again x

OP posts:
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 08/08/2019 15:36

Please be very careful between now and Christmas. You've told him that you want to leave, so he knows he's losing control over you. Which means his behaviour could well escalate (I really hope it doesn't).

Please tell a couple of real-life friends what is happening and what your plans are (but swear them to secrecy). If he becomes violent, do not hesitate to call the police.

And keep and savings/new bank accounts totally different, do not have statements sent to your house. Change all online passwords that you can with rousing suspicion. And has advised above, get all important paperwork out of the house long before Christmas.

I'm so glad you have a plan. But please, please, please keep yourself and your DDs safe. Flowers

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 08/08/2019 15:37

Sorry, cross post.

Yes I have done already, keep them in my work locker.

Smart move. You're already on your way to freedom! Small steps...

BuildBuildings · 08/08/2019 15:41

He has definitely treated you in an abusive and controlling way. I think you should leave him ASAP but if you want to do it in January be very careful. Once he realises you are actually leaving he could get nasty. If he's been capable of treating you like this then who knows how he could behave.

As pp's have said be careful with any finances or joint assets. It takes seconds to empty an account. Which he could do if he's not getting his way.

LCScotmum · 08/08/2019 15:57

Yeah yous are all very right in what yous are saying. I really truly doubt it would ever get physically abusive, I really do. He is walking on egg shells just now really and doing anything to please me, I'm playing along so life is bearable for now. If it continues until after xmas then all will be fine. I've dealt with it this long so another few months is nothing. In all honesty he knows I dont care anymore so in a way his words cant truly hurt me as I'm not in love with him.

OP posts:
latenightsnack · 08/08/2019 15:57

First of all you are so brave for finally deciding you need a change and trying to get yourself out of that situation.

To be honest, I understand your financial difficulties and the reasoning behind you wanting to stay there until Christmas but I would suggest you leave ASAP. Your husband is no fool and he'll start picking up on your behaviour (even more as he's super paranoid) and he'll start noticing little changes in your attitude that'll make him realise you will actually be leaving.

If you can I would strongly suggest you leave immediately without letting him know anything about it. Trust me, no money is worth putting you and your children at potential risk, this man's life is going to collapse and it's not going to be pretty when he starts realising it

Everafter1 · 08/08/2019 16:01

No question is it emotional abuse!
You must have grown accustomed to his ways to 2nd guess any of this.
His behaviour is wrong.

Belfield · 08/08/2019 16:09

Yes it is emotional abuse and I think you are right to leave. there is nothing wrong in my view in waiting until you are in the right financial position to leave. Get your ducks in a row. You will do it with more clarity and preparation then.

LCScotmum · 08/08/2019 16:12

Yea this is my thinking. My oldest is 7 she will remember things and I want to make this as less traumatic for her as possible. A

OP posts:
LCScotmum · 08/08/2019 16:13

Yeah that's it exactly. I havent been in any other relationship so in a way it's all I've known and its took for something to click and me to realise it's not right x

OP posts:
LCScotmum · 08/08/2019 16:16

Yea 100% agree. When I properly leave I think his attitude towards me will change. Hes heartbroken just now. Believe it or not we get on well when he is being nice so I think until xmas should be a breeze ( hopefully) and as I've said before, I'm over the whole situation now emotionally. I know what I want to just a waiting game really

OP posts: