My boyfriend won’t divorce his wife.

[Ace17]

I have been seeing my boyfriend now for 3 1/2 years. He has been separated from his wife now for 8 years. But for some uncertain reason he won’t divorce her and she won’t make steps to divorce him. They have no financial issues there child is 23 years old so I don’t understand why they won’t divorce. I’ve asked him on numerous occasions as to why and all he says is I will do it tomorrow. But its not happening. He can be very caring, loving and supportive. But he is a very insecure person he always needs constant recognition from women especially so is this the reason he won’t divorce. Because his wife still talks to him and makes him feel good. Any advice would be great.

I wouldn't put up with this. Give him a deadline to see a lawyer, and leave him if he doesn't meet it.

He is a loser who wants to keep having his cake and eating it. He won't divorce his apparently estranged wife because he doesn't want to. He won't commit to you either.

I think that is all there is to understand with him.

Dump him. Try to get some counselling to help with regard to your childhood issues and set your bar much higher. You need someone who respects you and who isn't already married (and remaining married) to someone else.

Im not making him into anything. And I’m not justifying your worthless comment! ! !

Ace17 l have been there with the parents and going to the first person who showed me attention. There will be someone else who actually loves you and wants to be with you and you are wasting time with this person.

I know someone in a similar situation, he won't divorce until he wants to marry someone else.

@Ace17 I think you have the answer from a range of people not invested in the relationship all of whom appear to be saying make Jack hit the road.

If you choose to continue this farce and expose your children to examples of how to stay in a relationship that demeens you and prevents you from getting all of your needs met, leading to dysfunction later in life, do so knowing it rather than with your eyes closed acting like you had no choices.

I think you know this is going no where. He is not divorcing and nothing you do will make him. You don't trust him? He's secretive and meets her without telling you - well he doesn't have much respect for you does he. Leave and find better.