I haven't slept for 2 nights and have been struggling so much since this all happened. I am recently separated after a 5 year marriage (amicable, my ex has moved on). In the last year I developed strong feelings for an acquaintance of mine and my ex. He is a much older man, and at a party a few weeks ago we got a bit flirty and he playfully said I should stop because he was starting to like me. We spent the next day together flirting and having great conversations too, nothing happened except a small kiss. The next few days we talked on the phone almost every day, flirty messages etc. I was elated and hadn't felt this happy in years. We had a big event lined up we were both really excited about and I thought this would be it and we'd finally get together.
The first part of the night was super weird -- he kept walking away any time I got close or tried to talk to him (felt childish tbh). I let it go, then later in the night things got normal again. I got flirty (a bit cheeky..it's been a while for me) and he was receptive, saying he'd thought about me etc. Then out of nowhere comes the high-and-mighty, "I can't date you, you're young enough to be my daughter and I want to be respectful to your ex. You're beautiful, I'm flattered, but let's be friends."
Obviously I was hurt but basically agreed graciously. Then the next day and day after he called for lengthy chats. The first time I apologised for making him uncomfortable and he reiterated he wanted to be friends, but that is was nice having my affection recently since he's going through a rough time.
The second time we chatted he told me about a girl who's actually almost ten years younger than me - who he wants to spend more time with because she's been dating bad guys and "needs someone mature in her life". Wtf? He didn't exactly say if he was romantically interested in her, but I got the feeling he was trying to make me jealous.
I've enjoyed the "dance" and build-up of tension, but I can't deal with games. I need clarity -- I am incredibly attracted to him but I know I'l get over it in a few months if he's actually a dick.
Please help MN'ers. :(