Don't know if anyone recalls my situation so will recap in a nutshell...
H and I seperated after his affair last year, the OW was/is obsessed with him and pursued him with something bordering on lunacy, he played his part by lying and deceiving both of us...unfortunately she got what she wanted and had his baby last week ....he has had little contact with her last few months and says it is over with her and wants us back...we have one DD nearly 6 and I am pregnant with no 2 due end Dec....
He has seen baby and seems will have some realtionship with it (and obviously with OW unavoidably)....so our relationship issues aside....
He has said today he feel he needs to tell DD about baby (she is very bright and observant we live in relatively small town and people talk)....and would also like her to meet it
Emotionally I don't want this to happen, rationally I really don't know what is best...she is so excited about my new baby, knows somewhat about affair but would love dad to come home...
So questions for the panel - when and how is the right time to tell her - him alone ??(my feeling his mess to sort out but might be easier for her if I am there)...does she really need to meet baby now (a newborn) to what benefit...one thing I know I do not want OW within 100 miles of my DC (she is immature self centred and has shown a frightening lack of concern for my DD so far this whole mess)...likewise would guess she doesn't want me near her child not that I want anything to do with it anyway....
This mess just ets worse now involving my DD and no doubt will hurt and confuse her