Just applied for non molestation order. Shaking.

[bellamorella]

Just applied for a NMO against my EA ex.

I'm so scared. He's going to be so angry. I'm scared the judge will think emotional abuse isn't as serious as physical. I feel sick to my stomach and don't know if I regret making the application as I'm scared it'll be laughed away.

Can anyone reassure me?

I'm sat here in tears trying to pull myself together

Hold your nerve. The very fact that you have had to apply for an order to keep someone away from you speaks volumes. Can you tell us a bit more about your situation?

You've been so brave, OP. These laws are in place for a reason. Please hold on to that thought.

Emotional abuse is every bit as serious as physical abuse. And yes a Judge will take that seriously. You're doing something positive to make life better for yourself.

He's the one with the issue, not you

I could cry. He's been texting me constantly, made vague threats, cancelled my son's cardiologist appointment, contacted my mum, badmouthed me to his ex, threatened to badmouth me to our son when he's older, destroyed my stuff, changed the locks on our jointly owned house. I've posted before but only just gathered the strength to actually apply.

Are you safe? Are you living away from him?

I can't offer any advice but I can offer moral support and hand holding.

And all of those thing he has done are exactly why you need a non molestation order. If he breaches the order and contacts you (even by text or via a third party) he'll be arrested.

What sort of sick fuck cancels a childs cardiologist appointment? Ask yourself that. Is it his son too?

Oh you are doing so well

Stay strong, you can do this x

GOOD FOR YOU.

I did something similar not too long ago.
I was petrified, shaking, sweating, gripped with fear of his reaction.

Once it's all done, they are notified, react, even when they are still reacting, the fear goes away, I think because you get used to the reality of having applied to the courts and it's no longer such a scary and alien concept anymore.

Hold your nerve, ride out the fear, it will pass and you will be stronger.

@gamedout I'm safe yes.

@NotSuchASmugMarriedNow1 yep it's his son too I couldn't believe he did it. Even the receptionist at the hospital was shocked.

Thanks those who've responded. It's a horrid situation.

Did you manage to get another appointment?

@ohfourfoxache I did. The hospital were great and put safeguarding measures in place.

I remember your previous thread. Well done OP, you are doing the right thing and protecting your child and yourself.
I hope you can find some peace and enjoy your baby now.

I'm glad the hospital supported you. In a way, it's good he did that because now you have additional evidence from the hospital about what he is like and could use that as grounds to not allow him access to be honest.

@NotSuchASmugMarriedNow1 I know he will get access, which I accept. It's clear however that he doesn't care about his son if he's willing to do such a thing. Not sure I'll have support from the judge when it comes to it so not holding out any hope. I just want me and my son to be safe and happy.

At least you can try to block access by telling the judge of this event. A judge would take this matter very seriously.

I hope so. I've read so much about the courts and how they fail people that I'm terrified of the whole thing.

Has the non mol been granted yet? Or are you waiting to hear back?

@AllAboutHallowsEve it hasn't been granted. I only emailed the application today.

Getting your non molestation order is the first step to starting a new life. It shows your ex that he can't push you around any more & gives you protection, once you have it, make sure you report anything however minor, to keep a full record of any abuse should you need to return to court to renew the order.

I hope it's granted op. What a reprehensible piece of shit he is cancelling his infant child's cardiac appointment

You have done the ONLY thing you could, you had no choice.....

Repeat to yourself
He does not make the rules
He gets angry so what not my problem
He is a pathetic little man.

Sounds really daft but it does help to quell the fear.

It will get better.

Hi OP, so sorry you're going through this.

I did apply for a Non Mol Order and occupation order whilst with my exH. It wasn't a physical abuse, but the constant verbal and emotional abuse, and the throwing of mine and child's stuff out ever since our DD was born.

The judge won't laugh at you, keep all your evidence. As a matter of fact, I felt safe and had peace of mind until I finally moved out with DD as soon as we finalised divorce.

I totally relate with you about the bad mouthing to your child, my exH said he'd do the same. Well, he's got no bloody custody as he never contributed towards the child and he couldn't care less. He's just full of shit.

I hope you feel better soon. All the best, stay strong and look after yourself and your DC. X

Thanks everyone. @MumsyJ was it granted quite quickly? I'm dreading having to go to court. I just feel so small at the moment.

@bellamorella It was granted there and then, he didn't even have to be present as every evidence was tendered. I was physically in the family court, didn't apply online. I just downloaded the form, filled it in and went in, told them it was an emergency. I waited until around 2pm then was seen and the judge just ruled it in my favour, but asked me not to serve him myself. So I paid for it to be served to him by hand.