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Original poster

Group tour holiday and the tip to the guide - AIBU to question this?

118 replies

user57424 · 27/04/2019 07:40

I am on a tour group holiday. 12 people. The trip was very expensive, you pay for the nice hotels and safe transportation etc. I chose it because I hadn't travelled alone before but I only just about managed to pay for it. anyway, after booking we have all the info through and the last page says there is the option to give a tip as is the local custom, to the guide who was with us for the week. they suggest 10 pounds a day, but at your discretion at the end of the trip.

during the trip, it has been suggested that 2,500 is collected, meaning we pay about 200 pounds each for a week. one person in the group is very loud and has sort of taken control of this and is asking when people are drawing out money so they can collect it.

these are people ive met on the tour so didn't know them before. AIBU to feel uncomfortable about this? I know they are collecting it for the guide - no concerns over that part - but I think 200 is a lot of money and the holiday was already very expensive. it is a poor country generally so I feel terrible at the same time!! I obviously have more than this guide and driver does, but I didn't plan to spend this.

never been in this situation before so don't know if it's the standard? nobody else has said anything about it but I did get the impression a couple of them were surprised at the amount, but in a group situation like this nobody wants to rock the boat or come across like a dick.

advice welcome!!!

OP posts:
IvanaPee · 27/04/2019 12:16

OP you’re never going to see these people again.

£50 is a bit stingy IMO given there’s a driver, too.

I’d give £100 if you can afford it.

To bossy woman: “I’m giving £X not £200, do you have an envelope to put it in?”

Come Tuesday that’s IT for the rest of your life! You’re never seeing them ever ever ever again. So what if it’s a tiny bit awkward and who knows? It might induce others to speak up!

palahvah · 27/04/2019 12:17

Oh - and yes it's quite normal IME to discuss the tip, but that's usually because people want to know if they really need to pay that much/will they be tight if they don't pay the amount in the info pack.
Are you with flashback by any chance?

TBDO · 27/04/2019 12:21

Just say I’m sorting out tip direct, thanks. If she pushes, say ‘I’ve already said I am going to sort it directly’ and no more. Walk away if you need to. Don’t apologise, don’t justify.

Why on earth would you let someone you’ve known a week dictate how you spend your money (and how guilty or not you feel about spending your money)? Doesn’t matter if she’s pushy - it’s your life and you get to decide what you are and aren’t comfortable with.

TBDO · 27/04/2019 12:24

Read a op suggestion to speak to her privately about the money you’re tipping. Don’t. Give your own tip directly - it’s none of her business what you do. She’s not in charge of you and the group - she can be as bossy as she likes but you get to decide what you want to do (and it really is none of her business).

EmeraldRubyShark · 27/04/2019 12:28

Cheeky mare 😂 I love how she’s appointed herself as group accountant 😂

This isn’t a big deal and is only a problem if you make it into one OP. Tell her it’s kind of her to try and organise the tip but you’re tipping the guide directly so she can cross you off her list. And no matter what she says just be a stuck record. ‘Like I said, I’m tipping directly, no need to worry yourself’.

It’s up to you whether you go with this or make your own arrangements. You’re a big enough girl to go on a holiday so you’re big enough to decide how and how much to tip, someone else getting a bit bossy doesn’t alter that fact!

PCohle · 27/04/2019 12:31

I agree with others that the tip seems to have been calculated at £90 x 2 for the driver and the guide and £200 is just rounding up slightly.

I think paying less than the recommended tip when you have received excellent service is ... not great, to be honest.

Obviously it's entirely your choice and you should absolutely be able to tell the organising woman that you are making your own arrangements. However I don't think it's unreasonable of her to have assumed that most people would be happy to pay the recommended amount.

youarenotkiddingme · 27/04/2019 12:35

I'm assuming it's India or somewhere similar as set up sounds familiar.

The tour guides are poorly paid but comparison of costs of living £10 a day per person is a good amount. It covers the fact it's often seasonal work.
You'll notice they often recommend restaurants because they get a deal with them. Many are actually self employed even if attached to a bigger company.

However each traveller or couple are seen as independent. They normally tip separately or as mentioned above an envelope goes around and collections are anonymous.

I would not be transferring any money to a complete stranger and letting them arrange transfer to tour guide.

JaneEyreAgain · 27/04/2019 12:37

Yes, you probably have more money than the guide and the driver, but you have paid to come on the holiday and they have benefited from this. Paying more than you can afford on top of the trip cost is crazy. I am quite sure that not everyone is leaving themselves short for the rest of the month to pay this tip.

There are many many inequalities in the world and I am sure that people who benefit from your work do not feel they should empty their bank accounts to redress the balance.

Tip what you can afford and are happy to give. Be gushing and say thanks so much for coordinating the tip, dear lady, (who will be accepting all of the thanks herself when she hands the money over,) and then either say, I have given as much as I can afford and think is appropriate and would prefer not to discuss it further, or I would like to thank the guide personally myself, I am sure you understand.

Original poster
user57424 · 27/04/2019 12:46

thank you!

to answer a few questions, it is one guide who usually drives (we have had one other driver for half a day). tour is with intrepid in south America (don't want to be more specific on here but hopefully gives a general idea of the area).

OP posts:
IvanaPee · 27/04/2019 12:47

Then just tell her you’re giving your own tip.

Original poster
user57424 · 27/04/2019 12:51

and re the actual amount, I do think 200 is excessive - I never thought it would be anything near that! however had I known in advance then I would have sorted it. as it was I planned to do around 50 which is obviously worth more where we are based in their currency. reading some of these posts, I feel a bit stingy!! the overall trip was £1400.

OP posts:
JammyGem · 27/04/2019 13:07

I work for a travel company who do group tours and I work closely with Tour Managers.
The TM would be horrified to find out this is happening. Tip what you think would be appropriate at the end of the tour. You dont need to tip as a group and just ignore this horrible woman.

keepyerbrowson · 27/04/2019 13:09

She sounds unbearable. I would never put someone in this position, never mind someone I met a week ago and know FA about.

JammyGem · 27/04/2019 13:15

Sorry, should say they would be horrified at people being pressured to contribute so much. $/£/€10 a day for a tip is the recommended norm, but TMs/guides/drivers are happy with any amount. Also, most group travel companies organise tips for guides and drivers so depending on the company they may have already been tipped. Although obviously any extra tips for local guides and drivers is always appreciated!

Original poster
user57424 · 27/04/2019 14:26

thanks all. I think I should have been more realistic as to the tip in general. im new to traveling and had only ever been to two eu places before this!

OP posts:
EnjoyItAll · 27/04/2019 14:47

if you booked with trailfinders they seem to set the same rate regardless of where you go but we were told by the guide what to tip local and it was completely different on all out holidays. just say to the woman you will tip them privately and do what you feel is right

EnjoyItAll · 27/04/2019 14:50

just seen it was intrepid. we had the same rate for Africa but tipped less as in comparison to the group tip to everyone else it seemed really high! do what you feel is appropriate

Charley50 · 27/04/2019 14:58

This woman sounds unbearable. Who the fuck does she think she is, demanding you put money in her bank account. You have no idea if she will give the guide that money.
Please, stop worrying about her and enjoy the rest of the trip. If she asks again, say I'm sorting out my own tip, please stop badgering me about money.
Then try and give maybe a bit more than £50 towards the £90 suggested.
I image you're in Equador or Bolivia, dunno why! Smile

WhoAteMyNuts · 27/04/2019 15:03

No to transferring money to her. You say it will get to the guide but you have no guarantee of that and no way would I do that.

I would put a tip into an envelope passed around on the last day or direct to the guide.

Maybe suggest to others that an envelope would be a better way as I suspect others might be thinking the same thing.

leckford · 27/04/2019 15:04

We have been on a few holidays where this was custom, it always needed up with some people not wanting to pay or paying a small amount. We always put our money in an envelope and give it direct to the guide

WhoAteMyNuts · 27/04/2019 15:04

And don't worry about 'offending' her. State it clearly and calmly that you will pass it directly to the guide.

Everydaypeople · 27/04/2019 15:19

She’s got some front expecting people to do bank transfers etc. I’d guess there’s going to be something in it for her, ie everyone else absorbing the cost of her tip.
You don’t know her, will never see her again so just put her straight that you are doing your own thing

helpmum2003 · 27/04/2019 15:19

We've been with Intrepid and the suggested tip amounts were in the Trip Notes which are ideally read prior to booking.

On our last holiday the whole group agreed on an amount, guided by the trip notes, and collected it communally. This was unusual as the group got on unusually well..... In the past there was a communal envelope passed round to put in whatever you wanted.

Either way you should not be feeling under pressure and there's been good advice about how to handle it...

helpmum2003 · 27/04/2019 15:20

Definitely no bank transfers!!

Pretry · 27/04/2019 15:55

Please come back and let us know what happens. I'm another that thinks she is going to benefit from this setup in some way.
I think you should do the £90 as the book says.