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Original poster

Wife is ill and asleep

110 replies

pearses · 05/04/2019 02:40

My wife has been ill for some time. Nothing massively serious, but pretty bad. She started treatment last week and it went wrong, they think something else is in play. We find out tomorrow, Jesus I am fearing the worst. I've no reason too but I just have this sickening feeling. The symptoms all match the worst case scenario - but they also march other things but they symptoms are so severe it seems unlikely to me, but then I no nothing. Sorry for posting here, I don't think I've ever posted but I've been here a long time. I can't tell her because she is in such a positive place, but I know ill not sleep tonight. Also it's not worth my life to wake her.

I'm not really looking advice, just wish there was someone to talk to right now.

OP posts:
listsandbudgets · 05/04/2019 07:19

More not like

Footle · 05/04/2019 07:25

She's not too good for you. You're a good person too. Good luck.

justlonelystars · 05/04/2019 07:26

Hi,

I don’t usually post on here but I suffer with tumours in my endocrine system.

Please feel free to message me if you want any info/general hand hold at all. I promise life isn’t all that bad for us :)

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 05/04/2019 07:28

Good luck to you both today

SinkGirl · 05/04/2019 07:36

One of my sons (2.5) has had endocrine issues from birth - he was just in for yet another test the other day. The tests can be quite full on and they do sometimes need to rush samples to the lab, depending on the test.

A year ago he was diagnosed with a specific visual impairment and the ophthalmologist immediately asked if he’d ever had an MRI of his brain. He was worried about a genetic disorder that causes this specific visual impairment and endocrine problems as well as missing parts of the brain. It was so obvious to me he had it, everything added up... except he doesn’t have it. The scan was normal apart from his vision issues being picked up. Sometimes it seems so obvious that it must be one thing but it isn’t.

The NHS will usually act quickly when there’s suspicion of tumours - there are plenty of benign tumours though, they just have to play it safe.

I hope you can get some rest Flowers

stucknoue · 05/04/2019 07:44

Thanks Whatever happens you are there for her and she is so lucky for that! Drs do rush tests through if they have concerns about a tumour, but as she's been unwell for months it could be the dr used the slight tumour possibility to jump the queue - mine certainly has overplayed things because they know the trigger words

Inawholeofdoom82 · 05/04/2019 08:03

Thinking of you both today. Hope it is all OK. Flowers

SirGawain · 05/04/2019 08:31

Thinking of you and your wife today.

Lovethetimeyouhave · 05/04/2019 08:35

What a sad post, I really hope you managed some sleep and I'm thinking of you today

swingofthings · 05/04/2019 08:41

I hope everything will be OK today OP. I just wanted to share that 18 months ago, I was so unwell with an array of very disturbing symptoms, I was absolutely convinced I was suffering from a very serious condition. The symptoms were very real, not in my mind and very deliberating. My OH tried to remain positive but was clearly very worried himself as he could see how unwell I'd become.

I ended up having a number of tests done, mri etc...and all came back OK. It took me a year to realise that all these symptoms were caused by the perimenopause. I refused to believe it then due to the severity and uncharacteristic symptoms but I now know it was.

cleanhousewastedlife · 05/04/2019 08:43

Make sure you have have some breakfast if you can manage it and ensure that you keep your own strength up too. Good idea to voice record the appointment. You sound like a lovely person who must be a huge comfort to your wife. Wishing you both the best today.

boatyardblues · 05/04/2019 08:49

Hi OP. I hope you managed to get some sleep. As someone with a long history of insomnia, I’ll just mention that DH and I have a nickname for the small hours catastrophising and rumination because I have it so often - “3am paranoia.” I’ve made a rule that I notice the stream of thoughts in the night, but never resolve to act on them until I’ve slept and can re-evaluate with a clearer eye. There’s something peculiarly bleak about the thoughts that come at that time. I couldn’t help but notice when you were posting, assuming you are in the UK.

Sending best wishes for your wife too. Flowers

poppingoff · 05/04/2019 08:51

Best wishes to you and your wife OP Thanks

sollyfromsurrey · 05/04/2019 08:53

Please realise that severe symptoms are not necessarily indicative of a really bad tumour, especially in the endocrine system. A very, very small tumour that unhelpfully is locate in a region that controls certain functions can result in big symptoms but may well be straightforward to deal with. Please get some rest as you will worry more if you are exhausted.

notapizzaeater · 05/04/2019 08:56

Hope you managed to get some sleep and get some answers today. The unknown is far worse than the reality. With reality you can make a plan.

FermatsTheorem · 05/04/2019 09:12

I hope the news is good, OP.

I know how worrying it is - I had symptoms a few years ago which could have indicated something very serious - sweats, palpitations, blurred vision, dizziness, sudden and very dramatic weight loss. It did turn out to be an endocrine disorder, but not cancer - in my case, an overactive thyroid. So you're right when you say there are other things her symptoms could be. Only the tests will tell, though I know how nerve-wracking it is waiting for the results.

I'll keep my fingers crossed for good news for her.

Itwasntme101 · 05/04/2019 09:37

Hope everything is ok OP.

I do think the worst bit is the waiting for results and to find out what it is because your brain goes into overdrive thinking of all the worst case scenarios. Once you now what it is then you can deal with it and move forward, hopefully in a positive way.

LoadOfUtterBoswellocks · 05/04/2019 09:39

Fingers crossed for you mate x

Thingsdogetbetter · 05/04/2019 10:41

I had a tumour on my pituitary gland. Had horrendous symptoms!! 3 days after my doctors assessment I had an MRI. 3 days. With the NHS!. The speed scared the crap out of me. Then quickly had consultant tell me worse case was cancer.... didn't hear a word he said after that! They really shouldn't lead with worse case!. Again scared to shite.

Thankfully it was benign. Took HALF a tablet twice a week for 6 months and it was gone.

Just wanted to give you some hope. Things aren't always the darkest we imagine! The fear and worry can actually be the worst part! Crossing my fingers for you and your wife!

AdoraBell · 05/04/2019 11:15

Hope you managed some sleep OP

gotmychocolateimgood · 05/04/2019 11:54

How are things today OP? Been thinking about you both and wishing you all the best.

Milomonster · 05/04/2019 12:13

Wishing you both lots of strength today.you sound like an amazing person and she’s lucky to have you.
I had a similar experience to @things. The word “tumour” is terrifying but not all are malignant. Mine was benign and was shrunk successfully with medication alone. Flowers

Original poster
pearses · 05/04/2019 12:39

Thank you for all the messages, really appreciate hearing other similar stories, thank you for sharing those personal stories, some was scary but hopefully not as bad as in my imagination.

Bit embarrassed about last night, just lack of sleep and bit of pressure and I whipped myself up into a mess, never felt like that before.

We have only had some small news regarding bloods, there in a under active thyroid problem and strange liver results. The bigger tests aren't there yet. Hospital want her back at 2 to retake the bloods, so getting sorted out to head there. I really need sleep now!

Thanks again for the replies, some of them really got to me.

OP posts:
pushingdaisies · 05/04/2019 14:25

Don't feel embarrassed OP, you obviously love your wife very much and it's completely normal to be worried.

Best of luck to you and your wife, I'll be thinking of you both Flowers

Cherrysherbet · 05/04/2019 21:57

No need for embarrassment at all. We all need a hand hold sometimes. Hope you’ve managed to get some sleep, and things are looking a little better.