Would you break up with your partner if they got fat?

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Keeping fit is important to me, as is eating healthily.
When I met my dp he was a runner and pretty in shape.

Since dating for two years, he eats more and more junk food and has piled the pounds on. He's not fat but you can tell he has a slightly rounded belly when his top is off.

For me getting intimate is not so nice now. Physical shape is a huge attraction for me

@Mysterycat23 I agree. DH is miserable too-either it’s becuse he is overweight or. It, I don’t know-but the two are hand in hand now.

He also seems to care very little about what he looks like-clothes don’t fit properly, arse on show, shlops around looking like a bag man. That’s as unattractive as the weight gain tbh.

Not sure I'd break up with him but I'd be telling him to sort himself out. Does he not run anymore?

I would not break up personally but you cannot help being less attracted to someone, that is not a choice. I love DH but he has put on 3 stone and is well overweight now. It's the huge belly I find unattractive however I don't love him less and overall I still find him attractive if that makes sense, generally I don't even notice it day to day but it is when I see photos that it shocks me. In person he still looks like the person I met years ago. Strange I know.

Not sure I'd break up with him but I'd be telling him to sort himself out.

What do people think is the kindest way to say this though?

My DH (and probably anyone in this situation) knows they’re overweight. So, I’m not telling him something he doesn’t know.

What I’m telling him is that essentially I’m not attracted /as attracted to him any more. I don’t know how to say that.

@Redlocks28 He will know you're not as attracted to him anymore but does he care enough to sort it out? I know when I put on weight I don't find myself sexy or attractive at all and I'm pretty sure my boyfriend feels the same way!

I Love them chubby!

What if you met them chubby and they got lean and ripped on you MumsyJ? Just interested in seeing the other side.

It depends on how fat they got and whether they were trying to do anything about it.

If it was a few stones I would try and encourage them to lose the weight.

If someone went from, say, 13 stones to 33 stones that would take some time. If they disregarded my encouragement and support to become healthier and lose weight then I wouldn't want to stick around.

I wouldn't want to watch someone's health deteriorate while I watched on helplessly. I wouldn't be happy at their weight causing them to sweat profusively, huff and puff, not be able to clean themselves properly, join in with recreational hobbies and lose their physical attractiveness.

So yes, I could imagine ditching someone in those circumstances.

@LadyRochFordsSpangledGusset gosh I hope not to a point of having a six pack, gym bod as I'm not a fan. And if he wants to get lean, it definitely won't be the OTT level of lean. He won't be dumped as a result though. What matters most, is on the inside not the outside.

Is it really the weight though or is it that it symbolises laziness/greed? That’s what would really put me off someone - the weight is just a side effect.

So no. We were lucky that the packaging that attracted us as fit and gorgeous kids with fabulous bodies was quickly discarded in favour of the real gift.

This.
We've been married almost 40, and both look much different. Things happen, illnesses occur, medication has side effects, accidents can't be avoided. And we still love each other, even more than when we married. As he said recently, he feels a deeper, more abiding love; that's what true love is. So if you're thinking of leaving him over something that shallow, you might want to take a long hard look at your own self. Not saying you're not a nice person, but it kinda comes across that way. Maybe you actually love him. If so, you need to show it and let go of this. I'm sure he knows your feelings.
Poor guy. 😕

No, but I’d support him in getting fitter because he’s really miserable when not whippet thin and zippy. I don’t mind the weight, it’s how grumpy he is when heavier.