OH attacked me but I can't leave tonight (pic)

[youjustdontunderstand]

Threw DS high chair at me then hit me with a remote. I have a job interview tomorrow I've already rearranged it so that's not an option and I need this job.

I have packed up all our things and hid them I can't have him know we are leaving.

Really worried about this cut being visible tomorrow!

@youjustdontunderstand . I'm so sorry u are in this situation. Don't feel guilty about the interview OP. I completely understand why you haven't gone. You haven't let them down. He's let you down. Xxx

Tell the job what's happened - they might be compassionate and rearrange again for you

OP you need to go to a GP today and have these injuries recorded and ideally photographed by them. Please do it today. Explain to the receptionist and go to a walk in centre or even A&E if you need to. This will help the police with the investigation/prosecution and an order to keep him away from you.

I really hope you're ok. You don't deserve this, no one deserves this. Do this for your daughter and for yourself.

Op

Had you rang 999 last night when the violence happened and you had visible injuries He WOULD have been arrested giving you a few hours space and peace to get your act together.

And will people PLEASE STOP THE SMS ringing police in secret bullshit -IT DOESNT WORK in the uk.

If you need police you can silently dial999 they will trace the number of you've rung before and know where you are or I've known dv victims ring pretending to order pizza - dial 999 and say you want a margarita to your address or whatever.....but the press this that the other doesn't work.

Op - if you call police are you willing to give a statement and see it through to court ? They will support you. In my force he would still be arrested today . It would give you some breathing space to get your belongings and arrange transport etc.

God help you sweetheart going through all of that with young kids. I hope you will be safe at your moms? Will someone else be able to go to the house and collect your things?

My ex used to deliberately (whether consciously or subconsciously, only he knows) sabotage anything that might be good for me or I might enjoy. Something would always happen to cause a row or worse before every job interview, birthday, family visit, holiday... It ruined everything and knocked my confidence so much. He hated my attention being on anything else other than him, so prepping for an interview would create tension then a row. I remember sobbing for hours after him picking a row on my 30th birthday - I mentally swore I wasn't going to spend another birthday with him.

And then I'd calm down, he'd apologise (whilst ultimately blaming me anyway, it was always he shouldn't have behaved like that, he was just so upset because I'd done whatever) and life would carry on, fine 95% of the time so I didn't feel able to mess my kids' lives up by leaving. Six more birthdays I spent with that arsehole. Don't be like me. Keep your resolve and leave, even if you don't feel able to involve the police (though you should, you know that).

Oh, OP. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I sincerely wish you all the best.

What a total bastard to do that to you.

Did all this escalate because he didn't want you to go to this interview and get some independence/control back? Even if that wasn't what you actually argued about?

X post with roomba

Thanks OP. We'll drop you a line by PM now.

Darling you need to report this to the police. It opens the doors to legal aid to help protect you and the kids, you’ll be eligible for more support and help. But you need it to go through the police and have it recorded.
I KNOW it’s not that easy. But you need to do this lovely, for the long game. Please please please

For those who say call a friend. Op may have friends in similar relationships who can't or won't help. Who don't have the space. Who aren't that close. DV is very isolating.
Op's mum was a fair distance away.
Some of us over estimate the support structures others have.

Bless you @youjustdontunderstand let us know when you are safely at your mums. X

You haven't let anyone down OP. There will be other interviews and a job and a better life when you are away from this man. I was so glad to read your update this morning that you were ok and safe. x

Hope you are okay. It does get better once you're rid.

Make sure you contact the police ASAP. I wouldn't want him to have unsupervised access to children, you need to have this on record to prove that he's a risk to them

And will people PLEASE STOP THE SMS ringing police in secret bullshit -IT DOESNT WORK in the uk.
Yes it does if you pre register, everyone should do this.
And will people PLEASE STOP THE SMS ringing police in secret bullshit -IT DOESNT WORK in the uk.

metro.co.uk/2017/05/26/how-to-silently-alert-police-or-an-ambulance-in-an-emergency-6664488/

Yes, what Vivarium said. If you really want the job give them a quick call and maybe explain you were assaulted last night (don't have to say by whom - maybe even say you were mugged) and are in no fit state mentally or physically to present yourself in the best way and ask if there is any chance of rescheduling? I know you rescheduled once before - and acknowledge that with them maybe (e.g. "I completely understand that this is my second request to reschedule and realise that this does not reflect favourably on my reliability blah blah etc.") but they can only say no. It may be easier to send a email rather than calling if you don't want to speak to anyone.

Sorry I haven't read the full thread, but if you want to make sure he stays away, please consider getting an emergency injunction.

The National Centre for Domestic Violence will do this for you. They aim to get an interim injunction in place within 24 hours although it probably wouldn't be until Monday if you call now as the courts would be shut over the weekend.

In order to get an emergency injunction there needs to be a recent use or threat of violence (within the last 5-7 days) so the sooner you call, the better. Their number is 0800 970 2070

They take your statement over the phone and deal with it all on your behalf. They do not charge for their service.

www.ncdv.org.uk/are-you-suffering-domestic-abuse/how-ncdv-will-help-you
www.ncdv.org.uk/are-you-suffering-domestic-abuse/how-the-law-can-protect-you

hope u r ok op xx

thinking of you OP

Also visit a walk in for an assessment of your injury. A deep cut may need glueing.

Thinking of you, Youjustdontunderstand.

Don't lose your resolve, You are doing the right thing, keep doing it. You deserve so much better. You won't meet the man who will love, respect and cherish you while you stick with the one who doesn't.

mycd

but people keep posting over and over how to do it without knowing if people ARE registered. and most people are not. im worried this would lead to no help coming in a real emergency if people just have blind fatih that if they follow instruction a b and c someone will come.

if you are not registered then the best and safest way to ensure a police/ambulance respond is dialing 999.

go somewhere safe. call 999. tell the operator which service you need and an address at the very least.

I hope you get to your mums house safely. Sorry about the interview, I agree you should call them to try rearrange