Can we afford a family?

[NormalGal88]

I live with my partner of a few years and his daughter.

I am on a very low salary, but love what I do and dont want to have to change my job. My partner owns his own house, and has a well paid job. We have a very standard of living. I contribute very little financially to the house. I do contribute in other ways. I have no savings etc

I want us to have a family, however he is concerned about the financial pressures that it will place on us as he will have to support all of us, as I will have to cut my income to work part time. He accepts that money isnt everything, but his view is that things are always more difficult when money is tight and that once the bills are paid there would be very little left over and nothing for contingency.

My view is that if we love one another and want a family it shouldnt matter. Live for the day and all of that.

To me, OP, you have to ask yourself (and him) are we a family combining our resources to build a life together

That's all very well until one person has no resources and simply lives off the other and always has. Don't be fooled by her saying can we afford a family, what she's saying is, can he. She already knows she can't, she can't even afford to live independently.

I wouldn't have a baby with a man who didn't really want one and it doesn't sound like he does really. I'd be worried you'd end up doing everything for the baby and he wouldn't help because he makes all the money. I really wouldn't put myself in this position. What if you get PND or have a c-section...or it's just hard. Just having a young baby is tedious and hard going. I'd hate to feel like I was going it alone besides a pay check really. If you do go for it I'd insist on being married. If he won't marry you, for the love of all that is holy, don't bring a baby into it.