Unrequited Love. Is it EVER OK to tell them how you feel?

[ttheycantalk]

Are there really some men who fail to pick up on the signals that you like them, I mean really like them? Even though you're more or less spelling it out that you fancy them? i have left many signals, some subtle and some not so subtle and I keep getting mixed signals back.
Should I force the issue and come straight out and say how I feel? Even if I end up hearing what I don't want to hear?
I can't avoid him. We work together.
I'm already in a unhappy relationship, could that be putting him off?
I want some honest opinions, even if they're harsh.
At first it was fun, now its driving me nuts and I want to know, one way or another.

So you are trying to entice him into an affair??

Is he in a relationship? If I were you I’d ditch my unhappy relationship.

He's not married, neither am I.
So no, it wouldn't be an affair.

I'd end your unhappy relationship and make sure he's free to commit as well.

If you have a boyfriend then that could be putting him off. You won't know until you're free.

It's so painful.

(and pathetic)

He's not in a relationship.
I'm wondering if I should just tell him I have feelings for him and then the ball's in his court.

If you’re in an unhappy relationship leave it
Don’t say anything to him whilst you’re still in it. It’s not fair on him or your dp

Dating co-workers is usually a bad idea. Plus you're in a relationship. He's probably seen your signals, but he's not interested, which is being sensible in my opinion. This is too risky. You should put it behind you.

Why are you trying to 'entice' him when you're in a relationship? Leave your partner first maybe?

Is this at your workplace?

If you’re in an unhappy relationship leave it
Don’t say anything to him whilst you’re still in it. It’s not fair on him or your dp

This.

Leave your relationship before cheating

He may well know you’re interested but simply isn’t doing anything about it because he knows you’re in a relationship.

He would probably respect you more if you were to end your current relationship first.

Is this at your workplace?

Yes it is.
All the advice I've read says to avoid the person in order to get over it. That's not an option. I'm not trying to entice him either.

I'm not and have never been a predatory female, I've never been the type to flirt much.

This has come from nowhere and and I'm not sure what to do.
I wish I could turn the feelings off. God knows I've tried. I fill all my free time, make sure not to listen to soppy music.

Nothing Works.

This is all completely irrelevant whilst your already in a relationship. You need to sort that out before you even look at another guy, never mind discuss how you feel.

Your feelings for this man are the symptom, not the cause. When you address the real issue - your current relationship, and how you are in it, and what you want - then you'll be able to manage your feelings, and not be managed by them.

Er, YES the existing relationship should would put him off you need to get rid of that first.

Dont tell him he doesnt want you or he'd be with you.
Men dont need signals. If he fancied you hed make it obvious.
Dont make a twat of yourself at work, keep your credibility and leave your man

Finish the relationship.

He could be someone that sees the drawbacks to fucking someone else's partner. You telling him how you feel won't help and things will become awkward.

Would you respect him if he was willing to accept your advances when he knows you’re in a relationship?

Men don't need signals?
Really?

Would you respect him if he was willing to accept your advances when he knows you’re in a relationship?

The way I feel I'm not interested in respecting him

Yes what Annelovesgilbert said, op do you want someone that doesn't care if you're in a relationship? Not very trustworthy. Not attractive.

If you're unhappy with partner talk to him and go from there.

What about respect for your partner then?

I think she's just waiting to read a post that agrees with her point of view.