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Original poster

How do I play this?

69 replies

user1471507501 · 03/12/2018 18:11

I recently confronted my husband about an emotional affair he was having (including sexual whatsapp messages). He was devastated and very sorry. We had it all out and we had a good discussion about our marriage. Things seemed to have got back on an even keel. However, this afternoon he sent me a whatsapp which was just 4 sexual emojis, which I recognised as the same he had sent to her. He immediately messaged back to me "sorry, just messing about with emojis. Should be working". Now, has he made the rookie error of messaging the wife instead of the ow? Or could it be innocent?

OP posts:
Mummylife2018 · 03/12/2018 18:13

I'd check his phone. I'm not normally an advocate of doing this, but when a marriage is at stake.....

MyKingdomForBrie · 03/12/2018 18:13

No, it could not be innocent. I mean, it could, but it's not. Sorry OP Sad

gonzo77 · 03/12/2018 18:15

I hate to say this but I don't believe him for an instant.

Klobuchar · 03/12/2018 18:17

He messaged you by mistake, the emojis were meant for someone else. Sorry.

Gs1405 · 03/12/2018 18:17

I wouldn't trust that and I would check his phone

billiby · 03/12/2018 18:19

He's really, really hoping you're going to believe him, but deep down he knows you're not.

His phone will be clean as a whistle.

Sethis · 03/12/2018 18:19

Pick up his phone and tell him you'd like to read his messages.

Note that this is "Tell" and not "Ask".

Response should be pretty much any answer you need. Messages should confirm.

AnyFucker · 03/12/2018 18:19

That was not an emotional affair, love

Aquamarine1029 · 03/12/2018 18:21

Mr. I'm Very Sorry accidently texted you instead of the other woman. Don't believe his bullshit lies ever again. He's probably already had sex with her, too. They are always "devastated" and "sorry" because they got CAUGHT. Get rid.

Zulor · 03/12/2018 18:22

The fact he said sorry, means they were sent to the wrong person. If they were intended for you, he wouldn't have said sorry.

PreseaCombatir · 03/12/2018 18:23

I agree, pointless checking his phone now, he’s gonna wipe that shit clean. Sorry op.

Thankyounext · 03/12/2018 18:26

He’s dropped himself in it there hasn’t he? If they were meant for you he wouldn’t have said sorry. Dickhead.

HollowTalk · 03/12/2018 18:27

He's an idiot who hasn't stopped what he was doing, OP.

Original poster
user1471507501 · 03/12/2018 18:28

Thanks for your replies. I guess I'm not surprised the concensus is it wasn't an innocent mistake. However, I don't think they have slept together. Oh God, I don't think I have the energy to confront him again.

OP posts:
cheesenpickle · 03/12/2018 18:35

That's exactly what I thought, I'd discovered an emotional affair. Turns out it was a full blown affair, 6 months. They admit to what you know nothing more

category12 · 03/12/2018 18:42

"sorry, just messing about with emojis. Should be working" - Yeah right, pull the other one.

What's the point of confronting him? It's still going on (or he's got another one on the go). So what next?

IShitChristmasGlitter · 03/12/2018 18:45

dont belive a word his phone will be all deleted just in case. I would act dumb and leave it a few days then check his phone again.

Norfolkenchancemate · 03/12/2018 18:47

@user1471507501 chances are he will have deleted the 'evidence' by the time you get to his phone anyway, because he knows he's f**ked up and has therefore given you advance warning to check his phone.
I'd have to say that I'd expect the worst. And if he hasn't stopped after the first confrontation chances are he won't until you leave him. I'm sorry op. Hugs.

Aquamarine1029 · 03/12/2018 18:48

I'm very sorry you're going through this but do NOT let him play you for a fool. All his apologies and crocodile tears were just him playing by the Cheater's Handbook. Lo and behold, you forgave him and all he saw was the green light to continue with his shenanigans. Why not? He's already gotten away with it once, why not try his luck again. Don't stand for this horrible betrayal.

Bumbelinadance · 03/12/2018 18:59

Op I am really sorry you are going through this
Not much to add .. the voice inside you will tell you I suspect as it did me
So not much to add except hugs and flowers 💐

It is however entirely up to you how you proceed and nobody except you can tell you how to do this
Goes without saying he is very foolish

FearLoveAndTheTimeMachine · 03/12/2018 19:08

It goes without saying that the message was meant for the OW. There is no way any man would send his newly betrayed wife a message that you know is exactly what he used to send his girlfriend. No way.

The ‘should be working now’ is cringeworthy, but I guess he had nothing to lose by at least making a flimsy attempt to cover it up. Did he even say what was working? What the issue had been? Had he mentioned his phone not working before? If so, why those sexual emojis? It’s all absolute nonsense and an insult to your intelligence. If you choose to stay with him after this at least you’re doing so with the full knowledge that you’re having an open marriage.

Original poster
user1471507501 · 03/12/2018 19:18

He meant he 'should be working'. He won't be home until later tonight. I still don't know how I am going to play it.

OP posts:
Shoxfordian · 03/12/2018 19:21

Stop being a mug and don't forgive him again
He's clearly still texting her

HouseworkIsASin10 · 03/12/2018 19:21

What's to confront? He has blown himself up, you know he is a cheater.

sparklepops123 · 03/12/2018 19:26

Despite what’s happened,is it something he would normally send you?
In all honesty I wouldn’t believe him,he’s tripped himself up and it didn’t take him long to do so

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