Can you cheat on someone you love?

[twinsrunmylife]

Recently found out my partner is cheating on me. I honestly had no idea and really believed him when he said he loved me. My sister and friends say I need to completely cut him out my life. I've always been under the impression you couldn't cheat if you love someone but it felt so real with him so I'm beginning to question those thoughts. Do any of you have any experience of this? Do you think it's possible to cheat and still be in love with the person you're cheating on?

Most people on this forum will say no, but I think yes.

No, you wouldn't hurt someone you love by cheating. You can be fond of someone and cheat, but love is much more than fondness.

Yes. But you shouldn't! Makes him a shit person. Your sisters are right, cut him out of your life.

That encapsules the issue with cheating, how can you love someone if you're ok with them being deceived and having 'less' than you.

Definitely this. They are lying because they want to have more than you. And get him off on knowing they are having extra on the side and you are not. That is nowhere near love. Sadly.

@candlemaker that is devastating

I don't know... I don't think so.

Attracted to other people? Yes. But physically or emotionally cheating, I don't think so.

The thought of cheating on my DP and the pain he'd feel causes me actual heartache to think about. I couldn't do it to him.

It's not just the cheating though it's the lying to your face and their anger at your for doubting them and all the trouble they caused.

That's not love and anyone who's ever googled affairs would know most of them never truly in marriage. So why do so many men do it!

They never cared to begin with or they thought they were cleverer than you and every other human being and they could be the one to get away with it.

That's not love that's a massive f you but it's also so so hard when you have loved them. You can't just switch your feeling on and off and you begin to question what actually matters.

Some people stay together. Who really knows if they are happy again or just going through the motions. It's all to do with keeping up appearances some women will never even admit they've been cheated on

It's just all shocked me so much because of course I'd imagine most people have innocent little crushes and I'm guilty of that for sure but I never would've wanted to act upon them because I love him.

I've got no idea how I'm going to rebuild my life but I know it's a long road from here. It's crazy and upsetting how life shattering having an affair truly is and surely as an individual you're aware of what that's going to do to your OH.

He is coming over on Wednesday to collect some things and I guess explain himself a little because the twins go to their DF for the night but right now I still feel like no explanation is going to be good enough and fear I'll just switch off whilst he's talking

Leave his shit outside and lock the doors. It's hard but that's what he deserves atm or shred anything he's left behind

@Holdingonbarely wrong on both counts.