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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Broke bf is pissing me off

75 replies

sabrina1234 · 04/11/2018 10:33

I don't know if I'm being selfish but my broke boyfriend is really starting to get on my nerves. I don't mind helping out whenever he's in money trouble but I feel like he is really ungreatful. The other day he needed money because he is in overdraft, and had no money for food so without hesitation I transferred him 100 from my savings! He decided then to spend 250 on getting a company to write his essay for him, which really got on my nerves. He said he's been struggling with it but I said he's capable and smart enough to do it and he says I'm not supportive or understanding! When I'm there encouraging him that he can do it. It annoys me because first of all were both broke and second of all he throws it back in my face saying I don't understand him. If I didn't understand him or his situation why would I be helping him?! Instead he mentions his girl friend from uni and says "she would understand" and "doesn't my happiness matter to you" which was the biggest dig ever. Then the next day we didn't speak about it until he mentions "you haven't asked if I ate today" which I usually, and says don't worry I don't want nothing from you and you didn't ask because you don't want to get me food. And it's like well what did I just do for you yesterday?! And on the flipside he's saying that I need to apologise for calling him a user. Right now were not even speaking. I don't know if I'm overreacting or what to even do right now

OP posts:
Minniemagoo · 04/11/2018 10:36

He IS a user. You are not his mother (seriously him being upset you not asking if he ate?)
Dump him. You CAN do better.

formerbabe · 04/11/2018 10:37

Pack him in....obviously.

woollyheart · 04/11/2018 10:37

You are not being selfish. He is.

woollyheart · 04/11/2018 10:38

Tell him 'I don't apologise for telling the truth', and then stop seeing him.

LordNibbler · 04/11/2018 10:39

He does know you're not his mother right?

AttilaTheMeerkat · 04/11/2018 10:43

He has taken your kindness here and run with it, why did you transfer any of your cash to him as well. That is money you will not see again.

Why are your boundaries here so very low that a user like him was able to come into your life at all. You need to value your own self more and raise your boundaries urgently.

SandyY2K · 04/11/2018 10:46

I couldn't deal with this tbh.

Whocansay · 04/11/2018 10:48

He's a leech and incredibly manipulative. And a cheat, if he's paying someone else to write his essay for him. He is not your responsibility.

He sounds like an utter cunt. Why on earth do you think you need to put up with this?

puzzledlady · 04/11/2018 10:49

He’s using you and making you a mug. Dump him.

notapizzaeater · 04/11/2018 10:50

Dump and run, very fast.....

Dandybelle · 04/11/2018 10:51

Wow, he's really playing you. Get rid. Tell him if ex uni gf is so amazing to see if she'll have him back because you're done.

Theyprobablywill · 04/11/2018 10:52

He sounds like a rinser, is this an online relationship, or have you actually met him?

ladygracie · 04/11/2018 10:52

I’m just going to add - get your money back first. Then dump him. He’s awful.

whatbeshrekking · 04/11/2018 10:57

What a ridiculous, pathetic specimen. Raise your standards, OP.

"You haven't asked if I ate today" Really?!

woollyheart · 04/11/2018 10:57

If you are not speaking now, that is already a great improvement

WatchingFromTheWings · 04/11/2018 11:01

If he had no money for food, where did he get the additional £150 to add to the £100 you gave him?? He clearly DOES have money but is sponging off you. Ditch.

alwayscrashinginthesamecar1 · 04/11/2018 11:06

Oh come on, you’re smarter than this. He is a user, a head wrecker and he’s cheating on his essays too. Just tell him to get fucked, you can do better.

Beaverhausen · 04/11/2018 11:08

Dump him, the man is using you and manipulating you. you can do so much better even if you are on your own, just think of the money you would be saving.

ButchyRestingFace · 04/11/2018 11:09

He decided then to spend 250 on getting a company to write his essay for him, which really got on my nerves.

Is he a student?

Btw, I'm doing postgrad and we were told that a certain number of essays will be randomly selected with the writers pulled in to explain their reasoning in great detail.

NashvilleQueen · 04/11/2018 11:09

Fuck him right off. There’s nothing to even think about.

MrsExpo · 04/11/2018 11:10

Congratulations OP ... I'm awarding you my first ever Mumsnet LTB ...

He's a manipulative user. How did you ever manage to start your post with the words "I don't know if I'm being selfish but ...." ? No, you're NOT being selfish. Get rid and do it now ......

Nanny0gg · 04/11/2018 11:11

Are you his mother? (mind you, if I was I'd be ashamed)

He is a user. Dump him. But be prepared never to get your money back.

PolkaDoting · 04/11/2018 11:12

I couldn’t have any respect for anyone who cheats in essays!

Juells · 04/11/2018 11:13

Instead he mentions his girl friend from uni and says "she would understand"

Confused

He's an absolute shit.

IntenseInterest · 04/11/2018 11:14

🙁

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