Apologies for the lengthy 'ramble'. I can't sort my thoughts out. I also apologise if I word anything badly, I honestly don't mean to offend.
I am agnostic, leaning towards atheist, but have not really thought through my feelings in depth. DH is from a different country that is also very different culturally. He was brought up Catholic, has always said he believes in God, but has never (in the 8yrs I've known him) practiced religion/Catholicism.
He has friends deeply involved in a spiritual 'movement'/'religion'? I don't even know what to call it. Friends/family I have spoken to call it a cult, DH calls it a Centre of Spiritual Study. He has dabbled in the past as something he is interested in but has enjoyed his lifestyle too much to really engage. In the last year he has become much more seriously involved, to the point where every Saturday night is a 'session' of meditation from 8pm-midnight. He has stopped drinking completely, has changed his interest in music totally to now only play certain songs that give messages of love and peace. He feels that he has become a better person, who is more aware of his failings, and is learning to be, amongst other things, more accepting, a better father (to DS, 2.5yrs) and in the near future to DC2, due Jan 19. He describes himself as a 'shaman'.
His newfound beliefs are causing friction or my inability to accept his beliefs are.
I feel that he has become almost fanatical, 80-90% of our conversations seem to end up with me receiving a mini lecture on something to do with the teachings he is learning. I am 5 months pregnant, so am not drinking, but I do like an evening out and a drink, and a lot of our life together has involved drinking and socialising with like minded friends, often in bars playing rock music. Our honeymoon was basically a motorbike tour of bars in Europe! We live fairly rurally now and, with young DC, going out isn't a regular occurrence, but I would like to continue to enjoy the lifestyle we built together.
I hate the fact that God comes up in our conversations so often, it makes me feel uncomfortable, but I really don't know why. Maybe because it is just so different from my instinctive beliefs. He 'accepts' that I will continue to drink, but doesn't like it, I Don't like the thought that he will be watching and judging me every time I do have a glass, especially if our children are around. I don't like that his sessions have become more important than family time, though he denies that. We (he!) Have been renovating and he is very, very busy both with our house and working long hours at work. I often complain we don't have much family time, which he agrees with, but will ALWAYS stop on a Saturday in time to prepare for and participate in his session, but won't always for family time if there is something 'important' to finish on the house.
We have had some big arguments because of tension built up from this. It doesn't help of course, that I am pregnant and probably hormonal, and also, we have his, also deeply involved, friend and his family (DW, DC3 and DC1) staying with us for SIX weeks, in our 2 bedroom house. It's also horribly hot (not UK) and I can't just be comfortable in my own home due to said guests.
I don't know what my point of this is. Has anyone else had experience of a partner finding religion? How has it affected your relationship? Thanks