New baby and boyfriend being a T**t

[PM2018]

Just looking for a bit of support/guidance/advice on my situation.
I gave birth to my son in January (he’s 3 months old now) and since he was born, my partner keeps going on massive nights out, getting absolutely smashed and rolling in at 2-3am. I have told him every time how much it upsets me as he’ll be at work all day and then just text me saying he’s going out for a drink after work and then I won’t see him all evening. This has happened about 7 times since I gave birth (which I think is a lot in 12 weeks!) and this last weekend was even worse.
On Friday I found out that on one of these nights out he’d kissed someone out in a bar (when our baby was only 9 weeks old!)He says it was just because he was drunk and meant nothing etc etc but he had text her a few times after.
Last Thursday night he’d been on another night out and he’d seen this girl again (she works with his friend) and then text her telling her where he was once he’d left. They didn’t meet up and then obviously I found out the next day but now every ounce of trust I had has gone out of the window.
He went to work on Saturday and was meant to come home after so we could talk about what had happened and save our relationship basically, but instead he went out to watch the boxing, ended up going to a club and then went to his cousins house and came home at 2pm the next day.
I’m at the end of the line with him to be honest- it’s so hard as when things are good we get on so well and have an amazing relationship, but his drinking and going out (and now what happened with this girl) have pushed me to the edge.
Today we’ve had another row because he’s now making comments about my weight, despite me only giving birth 12 weeks ago, and is saying that the other women on our baby courses were still exercising during pregnancy so why wasn’t I? He’s conveniently forgetting that I have had a back Injury for two years, and have just found out today that I have three discs popping out which is why I’ve been in so much pain for so long. I tried to discuss it with him and he’s just used it as an excuse to comment on my appearance.
I am obviously feeling extremely self conscious about how I look at the moment after pregnancy, but am I wrong to expect my partner to be aupportive of me whatever I look like?
I find this all so embarrassing to talk to anyone I know about it, so I pretend to my friends and family that I’m really happy and everything’s really good, but I seem to spend more and more time crying and am so fed up with it all.

Chuck that absolute fucker out!

Please don't be embarrassed, its your selfish wanker dickhead of a boyfriend who should be embarrassed!!! What a total arse. He does not deserve you. I would have kicked the fucker out by now. Please do. He will only get worse. Sorry. (But congratulations on your lovely baby).

Please confide in your family and friends, you shouldn’t have to deal with this alone. You deserve so much better than this pathetic lowlife who is presumably not helping much with the baby if he’s always out getting hammered, cheating on you and making horrible comments about your weight when you’ve just given birth to his child. I hope you mean it when you say this is the end of the line. Do you live together? If so then please ask him to leave. Or you go and stay with family where you might actually get some support and help with your new baby.

I’ll be blunt. He’s a grade A dickhead. On several counts. He need to shape up or ship out.

^^^
What pp said

Seriously, please talk to your family and friends about what is really going on. They will help you, and they will help you kick him out and they will be there to support you afterwards.

Why on earth are you still with him?

I'm not usually one to advise leaving your DP but sounds like a utter cunt in every way LTB.

STOP pretending to your friends and family that everything is ok (covering for his shit behaviour, actually), get their support, and get rid of the waste of space. You are vulnerable with such a young baby, and he is totally using this against you, when he should be fully supporting you - not acting like jack the lad, getting pissed and seeing other women.

Honestly, you'd be better off as a single parent . It sounds like you're a single parent anyway, the way the father is behaving.

What a disgusting excuse of a man.

You'd be better of with just the baby, he doesnt give a shit hes just selfish.

*This has happened about 7 times since I gave birth
*
This was the point where i had already decided you should dump his shitty arse. So everything else has left me gobsmacked.

Seriously, get rid. I’m sorry, but he doesn’t love you or respect you.

Don't waste another minute eith this selfish person.

He's disrespecting you massively. I'd tell him to do what he wants (and I'll do the same) ...because we are no longer a couple.

If you do nothing...it becomes acceptable behaviour for him. The power is in your hands.

Definitely get rid. What was he like before you got pregnant?

Tell family and friends and get their support he's a selfish knob!

He’s cheated on you love

Do you really want your son to grow up thinking this is how to behave and treat women.

Your allowing him to treat you this way so he will.

Oh sorry OP, you do not deserve that. He obviously can't cope with being a grown up so tell him to fuck off and live his life the way he wants to because you have more important things to worry about, namely having a happy life with your son. And your son does not need a stupid selfish arsehole of a male role model. Get support from friends and family and set about getting free from this fuckwit. Take care of yourself.

What an utter cunt! I know it seems daunting to be a single parent but you effectively are one now, he will drag you down, and break your spirit if you let him. Get rid of him and enjoy your new baby

I can only agree with all the above posters - Get rid urgently. You will qualify for help talk to your health visitor re what you are entitled to.

Thank you for all your replies...I know what I should do...but what’s been said above is the problem; I’ve allowed him to behave this way for so long (he was the same when I was pregnant- said he was ‘getting all his nights out out of the way’ so he wouldn’t go out once the baby was here-but he hasn’t stopped at all) and so now it’s just acceptable behaviour. The idea of being on my own is scary as he is very good with our baby when he’s here and we do get on really well when he’s not drinking/had a night out, but nothing has changed once the baby arrived and so now I think I’ve realised it never is going to change.

You need to pack his bags, you are right there I no way back with the trust or for your relationship. He has no respect for either of you. Enjoy your baby, build a good life with your baby and move on from this man.

You're already alone sweetheart.
Just do it without the stress!

I didn't read your full post OP but you need to tell him man up, grow up and f**k off. What kind of role model will he be to your child? What help is he to you? You are doing it all yourself anyway.

Please talk to to someone. Get some support. You don't need an entitled immature man.

The fact he is still seeing this girl (or attempting to) indicates its only a matter of time before it goes further. You should speak to your mum/dad and tell them. They know you both better than any of us do. However by what you have described Im afraid he would be out on the street.

Get rid of him
He's an immature selfish cheater

He has no respect for you.

I was going to say that he is enjoying the single life whilst in the security of a relationship, but really there is no relationship. He clearly has no respect for you or your child, you need to get rid of him.