Should dating a man much poorer than you be an issue?

[Neweternal]

I'm just curious if anyone has been in this situation before and if it should be a deal breaker.

Hairycoo, you're being deliberately obtuse, and that's being pleasant.

There's poor and there's poor in a way that will cost your children. The only two men I've rejected for being poor had nothing. Literally nothing, and funnily enough wanted to get exclusive and serious. One of them wouldn't even have had a pension in his old age. I am wondering if I'll be able to live on what I have! And I've two kids to put through university.

I met the women saying sanctimoniously ''good job my dh didn't think like you mercaneries'' had 1) good incomes and were relatively young men and 2) you were relatively young yourselves and were even if you weren't working eligible for a pension in your old age.

and for the record hairmoo, men have come on here and expressed caution about various situations and they have not been ripped to shreds. Caution has been advised. Have seen it many times.

I wouldn't want to date him, from your description.

"He doesn't do anything much and doesn't go out."

He sounds a bit boring.

NewEternal I see you say he'd move in with you tomorrow. Be so so so cautious here, as you're right to be. And don't listen to the posters who had nothing when they met their DH over a decade ago. It's a different situation.

Normally when I'm dating, the men are so so cautious, even if I feel they're lucky to have me, they're still pulling back, so isn't it funny that the two men I dated who were the keenest to seal the deal had so little. I have a secure roof to live under and enough to live on and that to some men is a fortune. And I know I'm lucky but what I have is for my kids. And to be blunt my parents didn't help me financially so that I could let a randomer in under the roof.

If he is right for you then he can change his circumstances. It is easier for men to find secure employment. Eg, men get paid more for driving than women do for caring (just an example one example but it illustrates partly why it's different for a woman in your shoes than it was for the ''DHs'' the women on this thread refer to.)