Mother's Day - a shout out to everyone who is going to have a tricky day

[KichenDancefloor]

Mother's Day can be difficult for so many people so I wanted to start a thread where we can vent, hand-hold and get through it together.

My mum has dementia and I won't be able to see her tomorrow. I've been a bit weepy all day thinking about the mum she was and the mum she is now.

Although she doesn't always remember who I am or our relationship, she is always pleased to see me and that life-long love shines through. She often asks if I'll leave my address so she can put me on her Christmas list and it breaks my heart.

I’m going to be spending mother’s day with my stepmum (who I love very much) organising my dads funeral. While trying not to let my mum (divorced Dad 30 years ago) make any of this about her. My own children will be 200 miles away. So not looking forward to this one at all.

Thank you for starting this thread. This is my first Mother's Day without my mum who died suddenly last year.

Aww I would be lost without my Mum . Thoughts to everyone who no longer is able to celebrate with their own Mum .

My children are in foster care , my 13 yr old Son made me a card last time I saw him and he admitted he didn't realise about the day but gave me the card he had made , which means more to me because he could've just not bothered . He will ring me tomorrow .
My Daughter didn't give me anything but she isn't as thoughtful as her Brother so I don't expect her to .
I will spend it with my children in my thoughts , I know they love me .

Lost my mum 18 months ago to ovarian cancer. Shops are full of things I would have got her as a present, instead I donated to Marie Curie nurses who provided amazing support and help so she could spend her last weeks at home.

My mum died last year and my H left me 6 months ago. DD is 2 and so unlikely to do anything on her own. Not looking forward to all the Facebook posts about perfect families.

I'll be visiting my mum today. She has dementia and macular degeneration. She isn't aware of much and forgets what I've said in less than a minute. I feel sad but then I try to remind myself that she's 92 and I've had many many happy years with her.

I don't have any children of my own and feel very bereft on Mother's Day. I have three adult step children and may get a card and flowers from one of them. They feel the loss of their mum at this time too.
💐💐

Well my mothers alive and well but we are NC due to her blaming me for my very abusive upbringing at her hands. Doesn't stop me grieving for the mother that I should have had and feeling deep sadness envy at all the people honouring their loving, supportive mothers who they have healthy relationships with.

to everyone.

Tomorrow will be tough for me after my daughter died last month.

@pogmella for you, I’m sure you’re a wonderful mum. Can you take your DD out for a bit of cake or out for breakfast and celebrate yourself?

for everyone else too.

May I join? My situation is a little different though. STBXH left 18 months ago for OW. I was pregnant but didn’t know at the time. I didn’t eat properly, drank wine, and I lost the baby. Two of my friends just had babies and have put up soppy Mother’s Day statuses. I keep welling up today wondering whether I’ll ever be a mum. Tomorrow at church (family service) all mums will be given a flower. I’m dreading it.

My own mum lives in a different country so I won’t see her tomorrow.

Thinking of all of you 🌷

I'm so sorry thedinosaurroars

I'll join in too.
My mum died on Tuesday , and even though I have a partner and 2 small ones , I'm still feeling sad.

I'm Very LC with my parents so I do find it bittersweet. However I'll be thinking of my friends DDs as it will be their first one since my friend died, the youngest is 12 and lives with a family friend, they are all still heartbroken

Not had a Mum for 18 years . She died related to early onset dementia . She was diagnosed at the same age I am now . So many sad stories on here . Love to everyone x

My Mum died last year & had alzheimers. I find it difficult at this time of year when I see pictures of people doing fun things with their Mums. Also when I'd like to ask her opinion on something that's bothering me. I haven't been able to do that for a while. On the plus side I have my own gorgeous daughter & will focus on that this year 😊

I hate mother’s day.

I have a tricky relationship with my own Mum along side attachment issues. I have also lost 2 babies in the past 3 years, it is exactly 2 years today since we lost our son at 14 weeks.

I hate the constant moaning about crap presents. My daughter has made me a card which I know will be lovely but that’s it. I’d completely ignore the day if I could but my dd enjoys making a card etc and it’s important to her.

Mother's day is a nightmare. Since losing my mum and dd1 I dread mother's day, Christmas and birthdays. I will go to the cemetery tomorrow as normal on a Sunday, stay off Facebook and avoid the whole day as much as possible.
and for everyone dreading tomorrow.

Not about my mum but my grandma. She passed last year. Still feels like it happened yesterday. Was with her when she passed.
Mum will be missing her and the 1 thing she wants no1 can give her.

Have bought some flowers for grans grave and got something personal for mum. My eldest dc is upset he didnt get grandma anything as shes not here.

My boys have made cards and that's more than enough for me

Hate the day, NC with narc mother and siblings who are similar, it’s just a reminder of what you don’t have

So much sadness on this thread. I hope you can find peace at some point tomorrow.

Thanks @Eve for the idea of a donation, that's a beneficial way of channelling my grief.

So sorry for all those who have lost mums and daughters, or whose mothers are unable to celebrate with them for any reason.

It puts it all in perspective really. Thanks for posting.

Bunch you're still a mum x

Thanks Rainboho. I have planned a little trip out to a farm but I know there will be families everywhere. My friends are super supportive and I've had a few texts today saying they're thinking if me. Still been pretty tearful though.

I'm not a mum and so have never had a Mother's Day card or present. I am a SM but don't expect anything from My DSC. My best friend is also a SM and we usually wish each other happy WSM day instead but she's just adopted so whilst I'm over the moon for her (and have sent a card) I feel very alone and sad.