Why are men so shit?

[Quiddichcup]

And i know it's not all men, but from a single woman's perspective, it seems to be a high percentage.

I was meant to be meeting a man for lunch yesterday. I know him from real life. No time had been set. It got to 10.30am and I just text to say as I hadn't heard from him I was assuming it was off and let's just leave it.
We have been trying to meet up for a while but it's not happened due to work and holidays, or at least I thought it was that.

He eventually replies to say he was going to text me when he got home. Which still would have been after we were due to meet, and that he's just been busy. I replied with ' me Too' and wont ever converse with him again.

But it's draining. I had sorted chilcare, got a nice outfit together, done my hair so i was ready.

I'm not even bothered over him , it's more the dis-respect and casual dis- regard of me and my time. And it just pushes me further away from even putting myself out there.

This happened with another guy from real life just a few months ago. In the end I did call him on it and he said sorry and even now he keeps messaging me his number if I want to go out. Which I don't, and have said so..

I just don't understand.

I'm not texting him. He last sent me a message saying please give me a chance.

I wasn't stalking him per say, it just popped up on my Instagram.

I don't want a fwb. Nothing against those that do, and I've had casual sex before, but I'd actually just like to have sex with someone who actually likes me.

How did you respond to his text message about giving him another chance? Emoji or actual words in a sentence?

This has all the hallmarks of two people who DO want to meet but are interpreting each others actions as not wanting to. Neither party seems to want to express genuine desire, perhaps through fear that the other doesn't feel the same way.

On the one hand, you're deeming his seeming lack of enthusiasm as a lack of desire, but on the other hand, your own actions could be interpreted by him in precisely the same way.

Stop messing about and tell him how you feel, and maybe he'll do the same, and you'll both laugh at how stupid you both were.

I said no, best to leave it.

Again, no need to be sarcastic because I use emoji sometimes. Most people do, it can help convey a tone.

An emoji doesn't mean I can't communicate and it doesn't mean that my smiley face I sent led to his shit behaviour.

Yes, so many men are just so full of shit! i remember years ago, i met a man for the first time, he told me he was going to pick me up at my place at 8 pm, i was excited and got all ready, and when it was 8 pm, he never showed up!, stood me up!i even waited for a while for him!!, then i said to myself, WHAT A FUCKING LYING ASSHOLE THAT JERK WAS! wasn't i beautiful? he was the one who said he will pick me up! you know what the problem with most men these days, they are just pigs and liars!, and all they want is SEX!

My philosophy on this is - plan to meet when you were going anyway. Going to a town for a browse? Plan it then? Going for a walk? Arrange a coffee after. That way when inevitably a cancellation happens it hasn't disrupted your plans. Not ideal but I'm single and often find even my actual friends will be like oh sorry something came up with xyz/partner/child and can't meet - when it's on the day or just before it's then hard to arrange another plan!

If its someone you are keen on then you could move to making shared plans - a place you both want to go, an event you both want to get tickets for etc. then they are invested. If they still cancel you could either still go or try and find someone to come last minute

Zombie thread from 2018.

Reading your updates he just sounds like a serial dater op. Looking for the next exciting thing. Forget him.